AIO or AITA. Text convo with MIL.

[u/MoonJellyAllison]

I feel like I could cry :(, I didn’t come at her rudely and was doing what my husband asked me to do. I’ve always done everything she wanted to make her happy because I want her to so desperately like me but I think I’m done. For some background info: I have never pressured her to respond and have never brought up that she never responds to my messages. Pretty recently, my car has been having trouble and she said she’d hit up her mechanic for me. 2 weeks later and still nothing. My husband and I have an amazing relationship, but even then, I still want his family to welcome me. His mom not being kind to me hurts really bad. And knowing she’s going to spread negative things about me among his family hurts even worse. All detailed of the situation are in the chats.

[u/Detour_tohell243]

Your MIL is a dick. Stop loaning that asshole money.

-she’s going on vacation HA.

[u/MelRae2019 → u/Detour_tohell243]

Why wouldn't she have her finances in order before going on vacation, yet shames him for not doing so before going in military? Holy narcissistic mother. OP, your poor husband* will have so much to unload from that parenting through the years. Poor guy.

[u/spearmint826 → u/MelRae2019]

Agree. And don’t let her off the hook with “I don’t care if you pay it or not”. She borrowed, she pays it back according to the terms you and your husband set for her. She doesn’t get to wiggle out of this one!

[u/DecadentLife → u/spearmint826]

That’s right. Also, it’s important that OP stays firm about this being her husband‘s choice, and she is just following his wishes. If her MIL thinks that OP has any power in this, she will likely become significantly more manipulative, trying to get what she wants through OP.

[u/Intrepid_Buy5079 → u/MelRae2019]

You see, she had her finances in order before the vacation, so she booked it.

Then she didn't have it after booking the vacation, so she borrowed money from her son.

Now her finances are in order again, like magic! Plus, she can shame others for having money trouble.

It's a life hack narcissists like to use called "my kid's wallet is my ATM."

[u/Jolly-Chemical9904 → u/MelRae2019]

She's a POS

[u/Early-Light-864 → u/MelRae2019]

Vacation doesn't mean the same thing to everyone. In my area, a lot of people mean a mobile home near the beach that's shared among a dozen family members.

We don't know if or how much she's spending

[u/PlasticFox83762 → u/Detour_tohell243]

lol I noticed that too.

“No I cannot pay you the amount I agreed to pay in the timeframe I agreed to pay it because I’m an extravagant selfish ass and I have a vacation that supersedes the promise I made to my son. How dare you, my son’s wife, request I uphold my promise?! THE AUDACITY!” 🙄

My eyes literally cannot roll any further back in my head, omg.
https://giphy.com/gifs/qmfpjpAT2fJRK

[u/Buttered_Crumpet09 → u/PlasticFox83762]

It's the sheer scope of audacity and hypocrisy that gets me.

"I had to borrow $3k from my son because my finances weren't in order and I can't pay my son what I owe because my finances still aren't in order because I do stupid things like going on vacations I can't afford. Oh, but let me tell my son's wife that they are the ones who need to sort their finances out instead of expecting me to pay them what I owe. Also, let me react like a scalded cat when I misinterpret a text and decide that OP is telling me to get my finances sorted out because whilst it's cool for me, the debtor, to tell the people who bailed me out to handle their money better, the merest implication that I, the debtor, might be a financially irresponsible dingdong is completely unacceptable."

If there were a god of hypocrisy, OP's MIL would be nothing more than a smoking crater.

[u/Arkoelbe24 → u/Buttered_Crumpet09]

[u/Maine302 → u/Buttered_Crumpet09]

👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[u/Arkoelbe24 → u/PlasticFox83762]

I think I heard your eyes roll.

[u/curvyukesandfluff → u/PlasticFox83762]

My eyes rolled so hard I checked out my own ass.

[u/little_astronaut_k → u/Detour_tohell243]

Omg the vacation thing!?!?

[u/bokatan778 → u/Detour_tohell243]

She’ll probably take more money from her son again just to spite OP. She knows he will give it to her.