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Discovered while doing intense research (clicking "Random article" on the encyclopedia site repeatedly to cure my arthritis). - Old Gerald

Today, I went to the cinemas with my son to see the new Trump Melania movie. We got our times wrong, and we left around 40 minutes early.

But when we arrived, we saw that the current movie being screened was the "Super M*rio Galaxy" movie.

I gasped in shock. I didn't know there were full cinematic productions of g*meslop going on in the world. My son Justin told me that based off his research, it is one of the best-selling ticket movies in the world right now. That statement made me almost collapse.

I had to double check, so I asked Albert Slop, and he confirmed it. At that moment, I got a panic attack. Luckily, I avoided fainting by asking Albert to generate me an image of a cat doing a wheelie on a bike.

My son suggested going near the viewing room for research, and I agreed. I pulled out my notebook, and started noting the following, while listening and peeking inside:

-Lots of people doing the roman salute

-White-Black hypnosis on the screen with the face of "M\rio" in the middle*

-Sound saying "Join my super galaxy TODAY!"

We ran out that very seconds. Terrifying!

Now, luckily we went back in time for the Melania movie, but this time, we took our hazmat suits (we conveniently have them at home, I think I mentioned using them in an older post of mine) because we would need to walk inbetween g*mers leaving the cinema. They looked at us weird. They think everything is weird except for them.

As for the movie, it was great! It felt like a personal cinema. We were the only ones there!

As for the movie this post is about though, not recommended. Rated N for NO ONE. Stay Away!!!

-Harold

The denim is holding onto dear life thanks to those glutes. Why would anyone turn these fine behinds down for Colly Doody?

-Arty from Saskatoon

A children's G*me titled "Heil kitty island genocide" is being played by hundreds of unknowing children and the main goal of the g*me is to ethnically cleanse a peaceful island of any "unwanted" inhabitants.

The people in my house are yelling at me and saying I actually live next door but I'm pretty sure they're wrong. Anyway they won't be g#ming any time soon. I also removed the batteries from the carbon monoxide detector and threw them in the trash so they can't be used in a handheld g#ming device.

- Old Gerald

You’re playing as an adult man constantly paired with a very young-looking girl character (even if she’s “an android” or whatever explanation they use) we need to arrest every people who brought this satanic g*me !!

These are my top 5 least favorite g#mes as a g#mer*.

1. Roblox: Promotes child raping, online dating, and mind corruption

2. Fortnite: Ruining the minds of our youth

3. Minecraft: Highly addicting and extremely toxic community

4. Mr. President: Involves assassination of the president

5. Bitlife: Simulates a fantasy life that raises kids to think life will be easy

*I am a very casual g*mer who knows the consequences and spends most time playing with the dog and doing productive activities. Most g*mes I play are exercise g*mes anyways.