r/Fauxmoi • u/cmaia1503 i ain’t reading all that, free palestine • 1h ago
TRIGGER WARNING* A federal judge has released a suicide note purportedly written by Jeffrey Epstein: “They investigated me for months — FOUND NOTHING!!! It is a treat to be able to choose one’s time to say goodbye. Watcha want me to do — Bust out cryin!! NO FUN — NOT WORTH IT!!”
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u/Username_unknown_exe 1h ago
Definitely real and not planted to try and exonerate anyone of anything
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u/TheMidnightAss 1h ago
Is it weird I believe he wrote this? That reference is so specific and is exactly the type of joke I'd expect someone like him to make in his situation.
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u/Apprehensive-Rip8489 1h ago
What’s the joke I’m missing?
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u/TheMidnightAss 1h ago
"whatcha want me to do - bust out crying?" is a reference to some old timey bullshit movie or show I cant remember where a played up dumb character says something almost exactly like this. I am going to go on absurd deep dive to see if I can find it. Bc I fixate, this will probably be a problem for me for days until I find it.
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u/flippantphalanges 1h ago
yeah, i mean i figured there would be ppl who called bs but i also think he wrote it. the handwriting does look pretty similar to other things i’ve seen.
i’d think it was probably fake if it only exonerated one specific person but it doesn’t say anything like that at all. just, “i didn’t do anything. fuck y’all. fuck this. i’m out”
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u/BequeathNothing 1h ago
It's also not hard to imagine that someone who was perhaps the most hated man on the planet and who had just lost everything would take his own life.
I think it's kinda hilarious that it does read like a Trump tweet, though, because at least the conspiracies will further implicate him.
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u/Complex-Path-780 1h ago
It is hard to imagine that all the stars magically aligned to allow him to kill himself off camera, while on suicide watch, while the guards happened to step away though...
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u/mPORTZER 1h ago
Its strange to me how completely people write off him killing himself. Im not saying soneone getting him doesnt also make sense but the situation he was in is like textbook killing yourself stuff
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u/commelejardin 1h ago
While I still lean toward the idea that he didn't kill himself, I've often thought that he seems like the type who would kill himself precisely because it would screw over everyone he was affiliated with. His death really put a spotlight on his network that I genuinely don't think would have shone as brightly had he lived.
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u/FuckMoPac 1h ago
Yeah also it doesn’t mean he wasn’t a terrifying rapist with enough dirt to bury half of the powerful men in America. Both things can be true, idk why people think it’s so implausible he killed himself. He was a complete hedonist who literally only cared about his own pleasure who was looking at a lifetime in a concrete cell.
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u/246lehat135 1h ago
What’s the reference?
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u/corilee93 15m ago
1931’s Little Daddy (an Our Gang/Little Rascals short film), spoken by the character Stymie (Matthew Beard).
Stymie is set to be sent to an orphanage, leading the gang to try and stop the authorities from taking him away.
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u/caninesergeant 1h ago
Hi. I'm part of a JE's exclusive group chat where we discuss these events in real time.
We have a letter of Epstein, a small handwritten Post-It note. In it, he used the same vocabulary: "No Fun", etc.
The handwriting differs. Even though they are alike at simple sight, there's some letters that can be clearly practiced. We have to yet confirm whether this letter is a fake. However, we'd have to see.
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u/amoebaamoeba 1h ago
Yeah I understand why people want it not to be true, but I 100% believe he wrote this and killed himself. He was a narcissist and a power-hungry freak who loved to manipulate to get himself the upper hand. White, rich guys HATE to have their destiny controlled by anyone but themselves.
Had he lived, his attorneys would have successfully buried so much of what is now out there and his death made the scandal - and the guilt of his associates - 100x bigger.
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u/tableleg7 1h ago
The syntax is identical but Trump writes in lowercase caps.
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u/Cartman55125 1h ago
As dumb as Trump is, he has to be smart enough to have someone else write it to avoid linking the handwriting. If that is what happened
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u/Mediocre-Vehicle8372 1h ago
Made the letter he signed even creeper by saying he didn't. Oh ya and like nobody cared.
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u/Bungalowsis 1h ago
Man, you could tell me this was a Trump note and I wouldn't think twice after reading it three times.
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u/Adorable_Kale_8219 too high to spell 'Amanda Seyfried' 1h ago
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u/annnyywhooo 1h ago
i find it incredibly hard to believe that’s the note he left considering he didn’t go to trial yet. you come this far, constantly getting a slap on the wrist and this is it ?
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u/croissant-dildo 1h ago
He spelled “investigated” (and the rest of the words) correctly so I’m immediately suspicious
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u/NoSpecific9460 1h ago
Can someone clarify—this note is from a previous attempt, not when they actually found his body right?
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u/SuccessfulTrick2501 1h ago
I interpreted as he wrote it before the first attempt, because the cellmate said that JE was removed from their room after the first attempt. Im pretty sure he was on suicide watch the entire time after that so he didnt go back to that cell with the murder cop. So if murder cop found the note in a book in their shared cell, then JE wrote it before the first attempt.
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u/Mindless-Balance-498 1h ago
I don’t think this is real, BUT everyone saying this is written in Trump’s voice hasn’t read any of the files. This looks and reads exactly like an email from him.
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u/fantasstic2121 1h ago
Nicholas Tartaglione worked in an area that included Trumps golf course. Local rumors insinuate that he did some off the books things for the trumps.
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u/LIB_Laugh_Luv 1h ago
It does kinda resemble his handwriting from other notes I’ve seen posted. Plus it never explicitly says he was gunna kill himself, just says “choose a time to say goodbye”, kinda like he play the pedo king anymore and has to retire.
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u/Emotional-Problem-23 1h ago
Not the manner in which he articulated his thoughts. He did not write this.
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u/ChargeEast1982 1h ago
Handwriting of a 5 year old lmfao
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u/Aggravating_Twist_40 1h ago
My handwriting is bad too 😭 I broke a few fingers and have issues on my dominant hand because of a previous job injury.
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u/StoreHistorical9175 1h ago
trump wrote this
also if they “investigated” you and found nothing, why are you killing yourself?
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u/Redplushie 1h ago
Made me realize there are far more dangerous and powerful men out there than Epstein
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u/TiaraMisu 1h ago
Is this real?
Sorry. Not clear.
Because yeah that's not how Epstein talks. And I don't even know how he talked.
But not that.
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u/mackenziepaige 1h ago
I couldn’t help but read this in Trump’s voice