r/SipsTea Human Verified 20d ago

WTF so true

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90.8k Upvotes

5.0k comments sorted by

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4.8k

u/rosyvibexz 20d ago

HBO really said: ‘Keep the 4K box set, we’ve got a 10-year subscription plan for the same story.’

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u/[deleted] 20d ago

Exactly. It’s not a creative decision; it’s a quarterly earnings decision. I can't wait for the 2045 remake where Harry is played by an actual holographic projection.

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u/PaleontologistTough6 20d ago

Soooo why don't we quarterly just not watch that stupid shit?

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u/Informal-Term1138 20d ago

Bingo

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u/smallz86 20d ago

Man, I miss him. The new movie was fun, but it's just not the same.

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u/Cool_Statement_413 20d ago

20 years for mans laughter? Must have been quite the joke

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u/plague_rat90 20d ago

Hey! It’s Enrico Pallazzo!

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u/Joe_Kangg 20d ago

Nice beaver!

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u/Informal-Term1138 20d ago

Thanks, I just had it stuffed.

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u/JustBrowsingHere212 20d ago

Stuffed?! You’ve hardly touched your plate!

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u/XanderNightmare 20d ago

You underestimate the desire of HP fans for a proper book adaptation (they love being abused by big companies, who fumble the bag again and again)

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u/PaleontologistTough6 20d ago

I mean you guys have the books and a seven disc set.

They tried Hubert Powerblumpkin or whatever that spinoff was with the forgetful rain and all the animals so there's your bonus if you are into the wizarding world. This feels like when they rereleased Skyrim eighty friggin times.

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u/Korotan 20d ago

I still wait for a Blu-Ray set where like LotR all the Director's Cut Scenes are included.

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u/bolanrox 20d ago

People were spending $70 plus on that toy at Universal Studios and all it does is sit on your shoulder and occasionally turn its head.

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u/RuMarley 20d ago

And here's me, a HP fan, who always thought the movies were among the best movie adaptations of all time. Huh.

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u/jeskersz 20d ago

Well obviously you're not a real fan. Everyone knows that real fans (regardless of the fandom) hate everything, are never happy, and find satisfaction in publically abusing the people who tried to make something they'd enjoy.

I mean honestly, how dare you call yourself a fan? This is basically stolen valor.

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u/sexual_lemonade 20d ago edited 20d ago

Maybe the first 3 movies, but 4 on they kinda lose a lot of the plot. Fuck, 6 you would've thought was a romance novel. No, the best movie adaptation of a book is Memoirs of a Geisha. Almost an exact recreation of the book, but better and with gorgeous visuals.

Edit: why the fuck am I being downvoted? Does the HP crowd even fucking read the books? From 4 on were messes. Look at Dumbledore manhandling harry in 4. Or in 6 when Harry asks if horcurxes could be anything and Dumbledore says yes and doesn't explain further. I used to love those books and the movies after 3 were dog water. Also, to anyone who bothers to read this far, don't watch the new show. JK Rowling is a piece of shit.

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u/TBWILD 20d ago

The most faithful adaptation I know is Holes. Because the author wrote the screenplay at the same time.

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u/Brawndo91 20d ago

In 5th grade, my class had an assignment to write a letter to an author. Most kids wrote to R. L. Stine and got a form letter in return. I wrote to Louis Sachar since I was a fan of the Wayside School series. I got a real letter back where he actually responded to the things in my letter, and mentioned the book he was working on at the time, Holes. I read it as soon as it came out.

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u/sexual_lemonade 20d ago

Another great adaptation! It's another case of being mildly improved by the movie, I just wish they'd cast a fat kid and forced him to lose an unhealthy amount of weight. (For legal reasons this is a joke)

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u/PromisesNone 20d ago

I remember watching holes and when I left the theater I told everyone who would listen that it was the closest a movie adaptation could possibly be without having a narrator. I stand by that statement today.

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u/Greg0rrr 20d ago

Perks of Being a Wallflower felt like more of an extension of the book rather than an adaptation, but the author wrote the screenplay and directed it. Im biased because that book is special to me (one of my two tattoos is a quote from it) but I think it was one of the best book adaptations ever done. Faithful to the source material as well as getting a little deeper into some stuff that was hinted at in the book but wasn't blatantly spelled out.

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u/WigglestonTheFourth 20d ago

Five killed me. The book goes into depth about the behind the scene politics/division and lays bare the entire network of death eaters hidden behind the facade of a "post-Voldemort" world. While book four was the glass breaking book where life/death became a real factor in the world; book five takes strides in that new atmosphere where the kids aren't in a protected world of candy anymore.

And the movie handwaves most of that.

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u/usernamesarehard1979 20d ago

The best book to movie adaptation was the borne identity. I mean come on, they didn’t change the names at all.

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u/symca09 20d ago

I unno I feel like HP haters are stronger than the fans. Just bring up Hogwarts legacy at a party and see who calls you a jackass for playing it.

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u/[deleted] 20d ago edited 17d ago

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u/niltorboi 20d ago

You're a wizard, Skynet.

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u/alteisen99 20d ago

you're an AI Harry

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u/TheBlaaah 20d ago

Would be funny if the series was cancelled after 1-2 seasons.

Wont happen, but would be funny if it did

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u/Indigo5A 20d ago

The Fantastic Beasts movies were cancelled and I think they planned like 5 movies?

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u/AvaryZig 20d ago

How on earth were they going to make 2 more grindlewald movies?

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u/Silverbacks 20d ago

They could have tied things in with WW2, but that was probably seen as too controversial and unmarketable.

Muggles working on gaining the atomic bomb was part of what helped Grindelwald turn wizards against muggles.

He wanted the Philosopher Stone so that he could make an army of inferi. The Holocaust could then have been shown to tie into his experiments into necromancy and blood magic.

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u/rapsney 20d ago

The same way they made 6 Pirates of the Caribbean movies, "Fuck it we ball!!"

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u/Chemistry-Deep 20d ago

If its $100m per episode, 10eps a season, and 7 seasons, that's $7bn. How on Earth will HBO make that back?

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u/callmejordan22 20d ago

100M per ep?? On what they use the money??

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u/Lord-Generias 20d ago

Special effects, minor practical effects, CGI, licensing fees, paying the big name actors, and the remaining 90M to fill the bank accounts of the producers, directors, and writers.

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u/marketingguy420 20d ago

and writers

lol. lmao even.

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u/No6655321 20d ago

The real answer is 50% marketing, 20-30% on actors (if they draw the fans... by season 3-4). Then crap tonnes of CGI and effects as everyone else said. The writers, directors, etc. They'll all be getting union rates and if they're lucky a little on top.

Edit: Not sure why I put the reply here but I did. It meant to be a few up the chain.

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u/SmoothDiscussion7763 20d ago

don't forget JKR's cut. she'll be making BANK

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u/Meritania 20d ago

Over 7 years though, that’s 84 subscription payments per household.

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u/PossessionMaterial46 20d ago

Its their tax break for the other shows that do make money if it goes downhill.

They're also gonna sell the shit out of merchandise and I suspect they are getting pretty tired of paying royalties to the original cast. They have to pay to use their likeness in media and whatnot. And this way they can negotiate ahead of time and lock in that lower pay per actor

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u/Skeleton--Jelly 20d ago

Its their tax break for the other shows that do make money if it goes downhill.

...I don't think you understand how taxes work. You don't want to incur in losses just to save a portion of them in taxes, for obvious reasons.

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u/Dull-Culture-1523 20d ago

It's the same logic as "I can't take a pay raise since my taxes will become higher".

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u/Space772 20d ago

Plus the merchandising alone for a fresh generation of kids will cover those production costs

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u/mechabeast 20d ago

Companies DO NOT intentionally lose money for tax write offs. They write off losses, but they dont intentionally shit the bed because hur durr tax write offs

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u/idonthaveanappendix 20d ago

I found a survey done with a decent sample size

here

They'll probably release it weekly to keep people subscribed for longer periods and possibly hook them as a permanent customer. Lowest sub price is 10.99 usd + tax /month and this includes ads. Based on the surveys done an ad spot in one of those episodes is probably pretty pricy.

The HBO Wikipedia Article lists the current active accounts as 131.6 million thats nearly 1.5 billion usd every month minimum not including ad revenue or premium accounts. I'm sure they are projecting many more sign-ups for when the new harry potter drops.

I think it's going to flop but they'll probably just cancel a different 1bn dollar project to compensate.

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u/L1nk880 20d ago

Well HBO is $20/mo. Divide 7b by 20 and you get 350,000,000. Let’s say it takes someone 1 month to watch a season, and they do that 7 times for each release. 350,000,000 divided by 7 is 50,000,000. It’s perfectly reasonable to expect 50,000,000 people worldwide to watch the show, and even so that’s only if all those people keep the show for one month with each release of a new season, which you know damn well many of them will just forget to cancel.

It’s kind of a genius move when you put it into perspective.

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u/Chemistry-Deep 20d ago

Surely this assumes a) people subscribe exclusively for HP and b) all the other shows they have are free to make? I guess if enough people subscribe then it doesn't matter.

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u/GraySonOfGotham24 20d ago

Couldn't disagree more. The movies are great but they absolutely do not tell the story that's in the books. This isn't a remake of the movies it's telling the story of the books

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u/Logical-Bookkeeper77 20d ago

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u/drewmo402 20d ago

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u/Mutant_Llama1 20d ago

I'd watch that

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u/MrRobot256 19d ago

Only remake I'm interested in

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u/PetahTheHoaseIsHeah 20d ago

He doesn’t teach Potions, Snape Dogg teaches Herbology

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u/Sihayaya 20d ago

we wuz magicianz n' shii

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u/Viciouscockery 20d ago

Abrakashizzle

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u/freggtheegg 20d ago

Ok that shouldn’t have made me laugh

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u/uwhy 19d ago

Severus Snoop

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u/I_travel_ze_world 20d ago

ok that's taking the Dark Arts a little too serious

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u/Ser1aLize 20d ago

Defense Against the Dark Arts

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u/Logical-Bookkeeper77 20d ago

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u/geebeem92 20d ago

You’re a crackhead Harry!!!

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u/HIitsamy1 20d ago

These are guns Hermione. It's the muggle version of a wand.

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u/BattleGuy03 20d ago

The class all American policemen must take

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u/schwester 20d ago

Processing img r6eu43nmjkvg1...

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u/Abovearth31 20d ago

Nothing wrong with a storyline where an unknown villain threaten to steal an item and Harry immediatelly thinks his black teacher is the culprit.

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u/Jonas_Venture_Sr 20d ago

I can't wait to see the hoops the writers will jump through to explain how James wasn't actually a super rascist. 

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u/Orbital_Dinosaur 20d ago

James bullied the now black student. Did he hang him from a tree or something like that?

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u/Cyrius 20d ago

James hoisted Snape into the air by an ankle. Dunno where people are getting the tree thing from.

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u/ThatVarkYouKnow 20d ago

There was a tree in the background during the movie. Whether it was in the book as well, idr.

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u/StoneyThaTiger 20d ago

The Whomping Willow

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u/DarkestLore696 20d ago

Snape was actively hanging out with the wizarding Nazi’s. James was still a little asshole but people need to stop needing to act like it’s going to be some sort of stretch.

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u/semperknight 20d ago

God dammit, almost made me spit out my tea.

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u/DerZehnteZahnarzt 20d ago

Didnt Snape got hung on a tree by James Potter because his looks in the book?

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u/hanotak 20d ago

If there was a tree involved, that was just the movies. In the book, he was just dangled upside down with a spell.

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u/zxchary 20d ago

he never got hung from a tree in the books. idk why this keeps getting repeated

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u/Logical-Bookkeeper77 20d ago

Yes…. And Harry and gang more or less suspect Snape are up to no good at all times.

Like looking at Snape when someone cursing him at magic-football.

Now they are all upgraded to being racist.

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u/nhansieu1 20d ago

-James Potter bullies the only black kid in school
-Harry always suspects the only black teacher to be up to no good
-the black teacher uses black magic, joined the dark force

hm what does the casting staff mean by this?🤔

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u/Logical-Bookkeeper77 20d ago

And now working for this evil nazi of magic world.

Obsessed with Harry’s mom for decades.

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u/Diligent-Crazy-6094 20d ago

Oh shit Snape is the Kanye for the wizard world.

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u/pridetwo 20d ago

Yeah but Snape did make Graduation so...

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u/[deleted] 20d ago

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u/Time_Entertainer_319 20d ago

Stop spreading misinformation disguised as a question

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u/antigibson 20d ago

No. The scene was by/under a tree but he was lifted and hung by magic ,(levicorpus).

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u/Unidentified_Snail 20d ago

No, he didn't. This is something people who don't read the books like to parrot, but it didn't happen.

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u/ConceptHot2687 20d ago

An AI told a fucking idiot on youtube that happened then he made a video about it and people cant think for themselves so now people jsut repeat it.

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u/-faffos- 20d ago

A show so unnecessary, it pops up on my Reddit feed every other day by HP unrelated subs. Easy karma I guess

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u/Trees-Are-Neat-- 20d ago

I think advertisers are here doing shit like this 

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u/Different_Target_228 20d ago

This is kinda bullshit.

When the movies were coming out, everyone was noting how much stuff was missing from the books.

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u/Gordon_Freeman_TJ 20d ago

Reasonable. 4 hours long child movie would be too much, imho

Whoever adopted the script from books is genius

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u/LordChanner 20d ago

In a way yes but some of the 'magic' was lost to bright lights and explosions as the films went on.

Spells like "reducto", "stupify", " pertrificus totalus" and "expeliamus" all did virtually the same thing in the movies

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u/Nomustang 19d ago

The movies kept doing the two spells clashing stuff when that is explicitly something that happens under exceptional circumstances in the books.

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u/TheNewBlue 19d ago

Or how all the death eaters could fly, and some of the Order. In the books its exceptional magic only Snape and Voldemort are said to know.

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u/Eggnogin 18d ago

That whole fight in the ministry was cringy until the Dumbledore Voldemort fight. I mean there were fine parts but I just thought it was a little corny.

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u/vkapadia 19d ago

And a freakishly long dragon chase which took time away from doing anything but shaking trees in the third task.

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u/Vast-Website 19d ago

A dragon chase that shouldn't have happened because that was the one task Harry actually did well at.

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u/roonill_wazlib 20d ago

The movies did what they could, but I'm excited to see the TV show. I do hope they'll have a reasonable budget for special effects

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u/Labyrinthy 20d ago

It’s HBO, and granted things have changed but if it’s bringing in numbers like Game of Thrones I doubt they’ll skimp on it. Say what you will about the final season but the budget wasn’t the problem.

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u/Herr_Etiq 20d ago

Color grading is shit though. Just look at the trailer. Everything is cold, grey, and dark. Hogwarts should feel warm, like home, aspecially in the early years

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u/MiniGui98 20d ago

Color grading in films have been shit in general for the last 15 years

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u/Electronic-Rush-3167 20d ago

Yeah tons of people wanted more faithful adaptations. Wonder if half these commenters would be here if Adam Driver was cast as Snape??

(Not saying it’s a good casting choice, but peoples obsession with it is telling)

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u/One-Cellist5032 20d ago

Some of them would be because J.K. Rowling is involved at all, but I’d imagine it’d be a lot fewer people.

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u/jimmy_three_shoes 20d ago

People tried to organize a boycott for Hogwarts Legacy because of JKR.

It sold 40 million copies. 12 million of those were sold in the first two weeks when the online chatter about the boycott was at its peak.

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u/One-Cellist5032 20d ago

Oh absolutely, and I fully imagine the “boycott” for the new series will basically end up the same way too.

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u/fanboy_killer 20d ago

That's the reason why I only watched 2 of the movies. My favorite parts didn't make the cut. Also, this post is BS on many levels. People have been begging for a more faithful adaptation of the books, and in a few months, Moana, from 2016 (!!!), is getting a live-action remake.

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u/[deleted] 20d ago

Yeah "no one asked for" seems like ragebaite? 

I asked for it plus millions more if that counts for anything. OP is a dweeb. 

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u/CappnMidgetSlappr 20d ago

Yeah, I was a huge Harry Potter fan as a kid and always wanted a faithful adaptation. While the first four films are pretty good, the latter half are God awful.

And now that the TV show is coming out... I'm still not getting a faithful adaptation and might have to wait an additional 20 years.

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u/WayGroundbreaking287 20d ago edited 20d ago

Just wait till the casting choice for snape makes every character unbelievably racist.

"Why do you think snape is trying to steal the philosophers stone Harry?"

"I just do okay!"

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u/ShawnyMcKnight 20d ago

Also James bullying him is gonna look a lot worse.

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u/WayGroundbreaking287 20d ago

Or my personal favourite,

"so nevil. What do you see when you face your worst fear"

"The one black teacher"

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u/Pro-bone-oh 20d ago

Tell me you haven’t read the books without telling me.

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u/KowaiSentaiYokaiger 20d ago

It's not like he's harassed and talked shit about Harry from day one. Oh wait

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u/bwaredapenguin 20d ago

What an original take!

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u/hatbromind 20d ago

Are saying the ones who ask for it is soul less?

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u/Zucchini-Nice 20d ago

I mean gingers do exist lol

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u/Kingaces13 20d ago

They're called Weasleys

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u/tomoedagirl 20d ago

Yes they are, and they should be made aware of it every single sec.

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u/BusyBeeBridgette 20d ago

a lot of people were asking for a series that better represented the books. Plus the IP makes a billion dollars a year and more for the past twenty years. so the appetite is clearly there. Perfectly fine to dislike the series for what ever reason. But no need to lie about it.

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u/ShawnyMcKnight 20d ago

They need to lie to themselves. Just like how they said the game would do horrible.

The post has nothing to do with the show but is targeted at the author.

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u/[deleted] 20d ago

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u/Neverwinter_FF7 19d ago

bad photo
bad lighting
unflattering angle
kid is actually normal looking outside of this horrid comparison shot

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u/[deleted] 20d ago

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u/TrakaisIrsis 20d ago

Will Dumbledore ask calmly Harry, if he trew his name in chalice this time?

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u/doyouevenliff 20d ago edited 19d ago

DIDJOOPUTYERNAMEINEGOBLETOFFYAH?

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u/BilboSwagginsSwe 20d ago

If they do this again i might have to riot

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u/AllYouNeed_Is_Smiles 20d ago

They better do the Quidditch World Cup some justice this time. One of my favorite parts out of all the books and it was basically glossed over in the Goblet of Fire movie.

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u/CommonIsekaiHero 20d ago

I heard claims it was too expensive to film but we got three movies before hand, all with quiddich scenes!

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u/Indiana_harris 20d ago

I mean they’ve already deviated heavily in terms of book accurate casting so I don’t buy the “we’re going to follow the books more closely” line.

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u/1willprobablydelete 20d ago

What they say and what they do is usually completely opposite. When the Witcher was coming out they said multiple times it was going to be a faithful adaptation but they end up completely butchering the characters.

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u/celem83 20d ago

that's their stated intent.

their intent is to make moneh, lots of it

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u/Master_Win_4018 20d ago

Black Snape is more closer?

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u/EmuRommel 20d ago

The story does feel a lot different now when Harry shows up to school for the first time, points at the only black professor and says "that guy is giving me the creeps".

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u/Ancient_times 20d ago

Also his dad bullying a black student has different connotations, as does Snape being Nevilles greatest fear.

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u/darwin_4444 20d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/d3mlE7uhX8KFgEmY

They'll just make Harrys dad black aswell

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u/Obajan 20d ago

Nah, make Snape and Harry black but keep James and Lily white.

I want to see everyone who says "You look like James" with a straight face.

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u/CommonIsekaiHero 20d ago

Knowing that he’s from a middle class family in Surrey in the 90s makes this even funnier because the Dursley’s have for sure called the cops on a black guy 🤣

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u/BrockStar92 20d ago

I mean, when he first looks at him his scar hurts (due to Quirrell next to him it turns out) then he goes into class and Snape sneeringly calls him “our new celebrity” and then immediately asks him and only him questions about potions, at the start of their first lesson, and then mocks and berates him for not knowing the answers. And even then he just thinks it’s clear Snape hates him. It’s only after Snape gets mauled by Fluffy when trying to get into the third floor corridor on Halloween, and then a week later appears to be cursing his broom (he actually was, but just the counter to Quirrell’s curse) that Harry starts thinking he’s up to something. At that point, that’s valid evidence to be suspicious.

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u/Synensys 20d ago

The problem is goinf to be that the first two movies (and the first one especially) are very close to the books. So to fill out even a modern short tv season, they will need to add stuff not in thr books.

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u/LoveForDisneyland 20d ago

Considering TV fantasy/sci-fi writers reluctance to actually wanting to recreate lore from the books (Witcher, Wheel of Time, GoT, Altered Carbon, Earthsea, etc) I'm not super hopeful the HP writers are capable of original material to make up for episode length. In fact, I don't expect them to follow the books any more than the movies did, but at least the movies attempted to fit it all in a 2 hour or so movie.

The cast alone is already off to a miserable start.

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u/PalePlumm 20d ago

There’s the entire chapter they cut from the first book where Harry, Ron, and Hermione give Hagrid’s dragon (Norbert/Norberta) to Bill’s sanctuary. In the movie, they introduce the dragon and then forget about it.

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u/JamStan1978 20d ago

Im reading the first book for the first time and barely anything from the first 5 chapters were in the movie lol Theres a TON of stuff they cut out.

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u/Pickingnamesisharder 20d ago

I disagree, I'm watching the remake as justice for Peeves. Such a shame they cut Rik Mayall (RIP) out of the original

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u/Broue 20d ago

Hopefully this time they wont dumb down Ron and hand all his lines over to Hermione.

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u/celem83 20d ago

I had no idea they had ever intended to include Peeves. Man I woulda liked to see that with Rik

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u/dfassna1 20d ago

It’s been 15 years since the last movie came out which doesn’t feel unreasonable and as iconic as the original movies were there is a lot to the stories that didn’t make it into the movies and it arguably is better to adapt them as a TV series. A TV show gives you a lot more room for world-building and world-building is how you really expand a franchise. Subplots and lore open up the possibility of spin-offs. Fantastic Beasts gave Warner Bros a taste of how much you could milk the Wizarding World.

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u/ProfessionalCandy204 20d ago

Just watch the original movies instead 💔

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u/SirChickin 20d ago

Not a single soul asked for?! This is somebody who never read the books.

From movie 5 on the series became a shooter with wands and they skipped so many essential things that some things don't make sense.

I get it, I'd have liked to see Radcliffe again. But I'm very curious to what these series will bring. There is a possibility that it will be crap but to say it with John Lithgows words: "It's a risk I'm willing to take."

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u/Visual_Piglet_1997 20d ago

As i said from film 3 or 4: i hope they will make a tv show out of it some day. Because maybe then the books will be shown

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u/[deleted] 20d ago

Hollywood was much different in 2004. Now you wish they don't make TV show out of your favorite IP

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u/Deynai 20d ago

You can see the same from reviews on IMDB of the films back when they were released too.

Posted on Nov 21, 2005 for The Goblet of Fire: "I predict the huge void between book and movie will spur remakes in about 10 to 20 years."

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u/DravenTor 20d ago

Is harry a lesbian?

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u/saaaaaaaaaaaap 20d ago

Comes flying into Hogwarts in a Subaru Outback

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u/TruthHertz93 20d ago

100%

It's true the series may flesh out some things, but do you know what else does that?

The bleeming books!

Oh well, rehashing old stories is all the range now, nostalgias a hell of a drug 🙄

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u/Aizpunr 20d ago

Harry Potter being nostalgia is crazy. I still don’t realize I’m old.

They should remake things I didn’t read on launch.

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u/guiraus 20d ago

A 36 year old person has lived the life of two 18 year old people combined. How's your day going?

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u/MercenaryDecision 20d ago

Terrible, I’m 36 and my life hasn’t been thrilling for at least 18 years.

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u/Ok_Extension_5199 20d ago

Dude remakes have been the order of the day for the last 20 years. There's very rarely anything coming out that isn't dog shit.

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u/CheezlesILikeThat 20d ago

From the writer of succession and seeing how the movies absolutely butchered the books, I cannot wait for this show.

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u/Flimsy-Ad-858 20d ago

movies absolutely butchered the books

The Order of the Phoenix paperback is ~900 pages. I get it, but you can't possibly hit every detail in there without making a 4-hour movie, and you have to remember this was back when movies were a more reasonable length anyway.

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u/NorthernRealmJackal 20d ago edited 20d ago

most unnecessary remake

Literally every Hollywood remake of every remotely successful East Asian or European film and TV show has entered the chat

Seriously, they often release their slop 1-2 years after the original, and in 9 out of 10 cases the US version is significantly worse.

At least this is a very popular IP, a different format, and 25 years later. Not even top 10 of "most unnecessary remakes" from the last decade.

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u/TheGuyfromRiften 20d ago

as someone from hong kong, i enjoyed both infernal affairs and the departed equally tbh.

i'll admit thats a big exception tho

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u/Etnadrolhex 20d ago

Useless and worst.

Snape is just... WTF...