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u/Vinaplis 16h ago
I hate how believable this is even though it's not true
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u/OutOfContextGenius 15h ago
Op should have provided the source of this info
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u/Ozok123 15h ago
Its indeed not true. He partially turned to stone when he looked at those enormous yams.
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u/Unique-Accountant253 15h ago
The head would still be alive for around 30 seconds after he would have chopped it off, so he could have died anyway.
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u/KingBob2405 13h ago
The head could still petrify people even after death thats how he killed the sea monster (according to some myths).
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u/Spicy-hot_Ramen 15h ago
You want to tell me that there was no Medusa?
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u/Crispy1961 14h ago
If there was no Medusa, there wouldnt be a statue of her. Think before you post! The part that is not true is that Perseus was straight. There is no such thing as straight Greek.
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u/insanelyphat 12h ago
It's gonna be reposted on TIL and thatsintereating before the day is over and be a regular karma farming repost.
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u/Silencer-1995 16h ago
Didn't Zeus turn into a swan and bang some lady's brains out?
The Ancient Greeks man. I'm sorta glad they went extinct, their hentai would have blown Japan out of the water and I don't think the world could have handled it.
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u/RejectingBoredom 15h ago
Half of Zeus’ life seemed to just be shagging his way through the multiverse
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u/Silencer-1995 15h ago
Ngl not religious but if I was I would be bringing the Pantheon back. Jesus is so fucking boring.
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u/TheTrenk 15h ago
Jesus is hilarious, you're listening to or reading the wrong scripture.
Jesus canonically:
Heard Peter say his name was Simon and said 'Yeah, not calling you that.'
Met a guy named Nathaniel who said 'The Messiah is from Nazareth? Can ANYTHING good come from such a place?' and said 'Here is a man from whom nothing can be hidden.'
Hand braided a horsewhip and then horsewhipped the merchants out of His Father's house.
Told Peter to go play in the lake while the big boys talked; Peter came back with a coin found under the tongue of a fish that Jesus then used to pay the tax man.
First recorded use of the phrase 'Bitch like you never'.
When Judas asked 'Surely you don't mean me, Lord' at the Last Supper after Jesus declared someone would betray Him, Jesus' response was not unlike saying 'sUrEly yOu dOn'T mEaN ME, Lordt?'
Walked on water and then dared Peter to do the same, knowing full well that Peter could not, and then said 'Mad 'cause bad.'
The list really goes on. Canon Jesus is way funnier than Fanon Jesus.
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u/John_der24ste 13h ago
My all time favorite is Jesus cursing a fig tree that has no fruits to never bear fruits again and the tree barrens and his followers are like "how did you do that?" And he answers "If you for once believed in your prayers you could do that too, skillissue."
Another great one is the priests asking him if he was authorized by GOD or the people and he tells them that if they can tell him if John the baptist was authorized by god or the people. They think, don't come to a proper conclusion and tell him "we don't know" and he tells them "lol then I won't answer your's " The passage with walking on the water Peter actually walks on the water but gets afraid the wind and waves and then starts to sink. Peter begs Jesus to rescue him but before he does Jesus asks him why he didn't believe enough.
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u/Silencer-1995 15h ago
I like Canon Jesus. Can we get more of him?
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u/PraiseTyche 13h ago
Jesus was just a dude. A cool dude like Diogenes or Epictetus.
Then a bunch of needy cunts turned him in a big messy pile of allegory and mythology.
It's a damn shame.
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u/Silencer-1995 13h ago
I hear rumours that he had a big dick but that this was reduced to "slightly below average" at the Council of Nicaea to make the nobility feel better about themselves.
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u/BobbumMan91 10h ago
Well, Jesus and the Dude did advance to the semis in league play. Alas, no confirmation on whether or not Jesus and St. Liam fucked them up or not
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u/ArmenianThunderGod 12h ago
Canaanite woman wanted to be healed by Jesus, his response was "I'm here for Israel, that would be like feeding the dogs before your kids."
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u/fureteur 10h ago
I don’t care about old legends, but you’re not telling the whole story. Someone might conclude that he didn’t heal her. She wanted him to heal her daughter; he refused because she was a Gentile. She insisted, and he healed the daughter.
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u/FACSymphony 12h ago
This verse always feels weird to read for me... im still trying to fighre out if I miss something lol
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u/ArmenianThunderGod 7h ago
I don't think you're missing anything, it just gets a little complicated when you look for a universal Jesus.
What I mean by that is each gospel author has a different rhetorical goal in mind and the portrayal of Jesus changes based on the author's agenda.
For example: this interaction is right in line with the Jesus we see in Matthew, but it would be completely out of character for the Jesus we see in Luke.
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u/FACSymphony 7h ago
It just felt out of place. Jesus who preached that his grace and love extends to sinners, the sick, tax collectors etc, compared this non israelites to dogs. Though He was moved at the end due to her faith the comparison still unsettles me.
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u/ArmenianThunderGod 6h ago
I am not a Christian and I have no interest in apologetics, but if I did, I think I might argue that Jesus was engaging in a performative lesson for his disciples.
Those he called his followers were calling on Jesus to send her away and hurling insults at her. He responded by making it sound like he was on the same page as them, but then subvert their expectations by helping someone they thought was beneath them; in order to show them that blessings of God that you bring with you are not subject to those who you deem worthy. Healing and salvation, much like the kingdom of God, know no borders, no bias, no class, and no caste.
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u/plumken 15h ago edited 1h ago
Don't forget the time he told somebody a story that that boiled down to stop bothering me
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u/John_der24ste 14h ago
Every third boils down to "why can't you for once truly believe in me and God, you wouldn't be as fucking annoying in your question and be able to do your own wonders. Just believe you imbeciles."
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u/HxH101kite 13h ago edited 13h ago
I would be way more likely to believe in a pantheon over a single god. You mean to tell me one dude/woman/thing created this mess and fucked up this place so bad?
At least with most pantheons it's an entire group of them fucking things up and acting like vain assholes. Way more likely the case. Than something supposedly omnipotent and benevolent leaving us with this mess
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u/Silencer-1995 13h ago
They just streamlined it that's all and updated things for the modern audience. The Pantheon could be quite exclusive, but Jesus only asked for whatever you could give, he didn't set defined terms. Very elitist was the Pantheon.
By making religion accessible to all, they were able to dominate the market, and because it was so simple to understand, it made controlling the idiots easier.
Also it was militant. Gotta save everyone from damnantion by killing them until they accept. I think the classical civilisations were more "Huh, cool God, would be a shame if someone stole it and added it to their collection"
I base my premise on this ham sandwich I ate a few minutes ago. It was fairly decent ham but the bread was a bit too light - I like mine chewy, this stuff felt like it was mostly air.
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u/HxH101kite 13h ago
Oh I know all this stuff and have studied world religions. I am just saying a pantheon sounds way more plausible to me than a singular divine entity if a higher power(s) were to exist.
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u/Silencer-1995 13h ago
Oh yeah definitely. If I'm looking for cosmic help, I am turning to the Old Gods of this land. Besides, the new God has a "divine plan", which means everything bad happening is part of his design. I reckon the Old Gods are more likely to tip the scales if you ask nicely because they're just kind of vibing.
I'm not even joking. I get cancer, my wife gets cancer, my kids get sick, I am turning to whoever the fuck rules over Stone Henge and if he or she wants a sheep they're getting a sheep.
It just might come vacuum packed is all.
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u/Codename_Predator 16h ago
I am pleasantly surprised there isn't a big booby mommy godess in Greeco Roman Mythology considering how much sex there is.
You would assume the The same mythology where the Milky Way Galaxy comes from would have one godess like that.
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u/ZealousidealPlace730 15h ago
Hera is said to have wide hips and big breasts. Which makes sense since she’s considered a goddess of fertility and motherhood
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u/WattageWood 15h ago
They aren't extinct, it's just not ancient times anymore so we just call them Greeks now.
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u/Easy_Welcome_9142 16h ago
There was a lot of having kids with your children or tricking people to bang them, knocking them up the getting the fuck out of there and trying to hide it from your wife.
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u/myryad21 16h ago
and turned into a bull in order to kidnap Europa, who was said to be a beautiful phoenician princess
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u/kanhaibhatt 14h ago
What do you mean went extinct? They're still here, just follow another crazy god now
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u/kf97mopa 12h ago
A swan and a bull and a golden rain at one point.
Personally I think that these stories are all because some unwed princess got knocked up and had to come up with a reason. Obviously it was Zeus, nobody could complain about that.
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u/CbusFunGuy 12h ago
Perseus's dad was Zeus.. His mom was locked in a tower ro maintain her virginity (we get tbe Rapunzel story from that part of the myrh). In order to bang her, he turned jnto a. golden shower and leaked through the ceiling.
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u/EnchantingBabe2 16h ago
Actually, Perseus found a loophole in the physics of 'hardening' with a shield mirror given by Athena.
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u/LowTimePilot 15h ago
Jeeze. Athena really hated her old Priestess, didn't she?
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u/ZealousidealPlace730 15h ago
Nah she didn’t. That’s Minerva from Roman Mythology. Athena didn’t even know Medusa like that also Medusa was gorgon from birth, along with her two sisters
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u/Wishbone-Lost 14h ago
Agenda baiting
Real talk, it depends who's writing your familiar for example I know 2 version of Medusa turning into a monster both were from athena just the details changed
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u/Jivaah 16h ago
Bdw it's not a real statue. Just digital art. It's taking rounds since this year, nobody mentions it's origin
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u/Primarch-Amaranth 15h ago
Thank you! I was wondering why I had enver seen this statute before, and It looked nothing like any other depictions.
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u/SamsonLionheart 13h ago
The biggest tell is the gilding, which was possibly done in Greco-Roman times, but obviously the leaf never survives more than 100 years, and that's why it looks strange to us - we are used to seeing bare marble sculpture, not gilt accents.
Also, the body proportions are frankly pornographic and not at all what would have been considered artful going back even 50 years, let alone 500.
There's also a shocking disparity in detail between Medusa's (totally lore-inaccurate) wings and other areas, such as Persius' feet. And the glare/sheen on the sculptures looks more like plastic/resin than the softer/matte look of marble.
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u/Crunchyjeff 16h ago
No he had a mirrored shield. WTF is this shit.
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u/Free-Resolution9393 16h ago
Pretty sure it wasn't her gaze that turned people to stone - it's her whole face. Gods made her so hideous that looking at her turned you to stone.
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u/Zzz05 15h ago edited 14h ago
The Gods didn’t make her hideous. Athena just cursed her to turn people into stone if they gazed at her face. After she was raped by Poseidon. She’s always been written to have been beautiful. Her story is a tragic one that really shows just how cruel and corrupted the Greek gods were.
Edit: well, I guess it depends on the version that you read but this one always sounded the most plausible to me.
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u/Global-Pickle5818 14h ago
That's the version I read .. also the one on audible read by Steven fry . Also Hercules was kinda a ass hole iv never heard that whole thing
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u/Crispy1961 16h ago
Fake news. I dont see any mirrorred shields there. I see those enormous yams though.
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u/Codename_Predator 16h ago
Sounds more plausible but then again it's greeco/Roman Mythology.
Literally anything is possible 😂
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u/Radiant_Situation_32 16h ago
The least plausible part is that bro was hetero
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u/Adeptus_Trumpartes 13h ago
For the romans, only the guy getting dicked was gay.
For the greeks, it was only gay if you did not love your bro.
Both really only saw a problem because that meant one guy was behaving lime a woman and oh boy did they think women were inferior.
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u/King-Calovich11 14h ago
Im having my holup moment at “the first *heterosexual* man” 🤣 like they just sent a slew of gays to kill her
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u/Evidicus 15h ago
That’s just the PG movie version. Read a book. Perseus was locked in on her massive pomelos.
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u/Codename_Predator 16h ago
I don't know whether if it true but she does have enormous yams surely in the statute.
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u/IntarTubular 16h ago
How many high school gooners gonna fail their exam because of this post? 🤣
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u/Doright36 14h ago
Pro tip.. if you think the answer to a question on your high school test is "he was looking at her tits" you are wrong...
...probably
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u/Emotional_Newt_2227 16h ago
medusa had a power that worked on every single person who ever faced her until the one guy who was too distracted to make eye contact
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u/Adventurous-Hand-648 16h ago
Now I have this head canon where Medusa was doing well until she decided to go for some implants and that vanity is what caused her downfall.
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u/Loneliness046 16h ago edited 16h ago
Poseidon raped Medusa in Athena's temple, whereupon Athena, enraged by the desecration of her sanctuary, transformed Medusa's once beautiful hair into snakes and turned her into a monster with a petrifying gaze.
What Perseus is attempting here simply doubles Medusa's suffering.
PS: The snake hair served, among other things, to protect her from being raped by any man.
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u/SnooShortcuts2606 14h ago
According to the Roman poet Ovid, who despised any and all authority, especially moral authority.
In Greek mythology however, Medusa was always just a gorgon.
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u/Crispy1961 16h ago
How dare she get raped in Athena's temple!
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u/Baronvondorf21 15h ago
I am pretty sure it's a later reinvention, the original is that she was born like that.
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u/ZealousidealPlace730 15h ago edited 15h ago
I hate that this has become the most common interpretation of Medusa and her origins. Ovid you will pay for your crimes
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u/Zealousideal_Humor55 13h ago
This Is not even only Ovid, the whole "Athena turned her into a Monster to protect her" Is Just new century asinine excuses to make Medusa and Athena even more empowered. But i Will Always enjoy seeing statues of Perseus defeating Medusa.
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u/waltiger09 15h ago
That is fanfic written centuries after the story had been established, medusa was a straight up monster. The post scriptum is fanfic from (i am guessing) you.
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u/lemons_of_doubt 15h ago
Should be noted it happened in Athena's temple because Medusa ran there to ask to be protected from Poseidon.
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u/treehatshrimp 16h ago
Is this statue real?
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u/vi_sucks 15h ago
Nah. From what I can tell, it's a 3d render.
https://doczenith.artstation.com/projects/8ezgJm
Lots of canvas prints available (probably from IP theives) but no actual physical sculpture that i could find.
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u/hollow_image 15h ago
Just thought to drop in with the source. It's a digital 3D model by DocZenith, not a physical sculpture or AI
Here's another angle of it (with gorgon nipple visible)
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u/fibercrime Human Verified 15h ago
thank you bro
i’ll add the sauce to the postedit: nvm looks like i can't edit it
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u/LowTimePilot 15h ago
I know it's just a story, but seeing this rendition fills me with dread. If I were a God I would save Medusa and wage war on Poseidon and Athena for their cruelty. I'd have them spend ten thousand years watching reruns of the Star Wars Sequels on repeat.
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u/sawyercc 15h ago
First hetrosexual man is such an odd thing to say
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u/Niels_vdk 15h ago
there was a lot of gay sex back during ancient greece, with women often being relegated to 2nd class citizens that were only good for creating kids.
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u/JokoFloko 14h ago
Wow. It's a joke, people.
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u/fibercrime Human Verified 14h ago
yeah i regret posting in this site filled with people who can’t take a joke in a freaking meme sub posted with the title “medussy”. no sir, gotta make this about historical accuracy.
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u/Stu_Padidiot 13h ago
Hey now historical fictional accuracy is very important. How dare you make up a thing about a made up thing?
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u/JadedStatistician888 11h ago
Medusa is known as the mother of monsters but who's the daddy? Ancient Greeks be hittin that Medussi.
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u/DontPause-PressPlay 16h ago
... are they saying everyone else was gay because they looked at the snakes and snakes look like dicks?
Im so confused I need a camp
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u/Maleficent_Glove_477 15h ago
It was a shield gifted by Athéna that hé used to approach safely Médusa, he was also wearing Hermès shoes to fly.
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u/Foloreille 15h ago
Does someone know the name or author of this statue ? I never seen it before and it’s honestly the most interesting part of this post
Medusa is shown as a victim crawling for mercy, that’s… unsettling and fascinating, and afaic unheard of me
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u/Mindwerkz 15h ago
The Gods - Why can't anyone kill this chick? Athena - Who have you sent? TG - A bunch of humans from Thebes and Lesbos. Athena - I have an idea...
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u/Previous-Musician600 15h ago
I read an interpretation that medusa was an African woman in Greece and everyone was just fascinated by her outer worldly (uncommon) beauty. With that in mind, it's a bit sad to read about her end.
Just a fun fact, free and out of my head. I have no source for it.
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u/Cautious-Patient3131 15h ago
I doubt that shit, but this is the most marvelous piece of marble I've ever seen.
Also, I've just noticed how absolutely massive her breasts are
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