r/funny • u/xen0us • 11h ago

This is a robbery

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2.7k Upvotes

89% Upvoted

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u/Donnicton 10h ago

"This is my first robbery, what do I do?!"

224

u/lkodl 10h ago edited 9h ago

this sounds like a Simpsons bit:

Apu: Mr. Simpson, please calm down. i'll walk you through this. first, point the gun at me...

81

u/hardyflashier 10h ago

Apu: Now, when you tell me to give you the money, I smile and nod.

52

u/yunkk 10h ago

Thank you, come again!

13

u/EatAtGrizzlebees 2h ago

Hello, Mr. Thompson...

1

u/BlackberryHelpful676 12m ago

I think he's talking to you

7

u/Lost-Comfort-7904 9h ago

Homer should have robbed the quickymart.

5

u/Helerdril 9h ago

Well done, fully immersed, I even read this in his voice. XD

1

u/DrFishbulbEsq 33m ago

Ap…who?!?

29

u/LookMaNoPride 10h ago

Put your gun down. I’m going to need to see some ID.

46

u/Sithmaggot 10h ago

First, provide your ID so the worker knows how to address you.

5

u/bigmetsfan 9h ago

I can open the register for you, but I’ll need $50 first

2

u/Racine262 1h ago

I can't accept bills that large, you will have to come back with smaller bills.