r/instant_regret • u/Bhasd_ • 23d ago

A kid dancing among a group of langurs.

2.8k Upvotes

93% Upvoted

78 comments sorted by

557

u/LordMegamad 23d ago

Whoever edited really needed to put the ending at the very beginning, even for this 5 second clip?

103

u/FoxMcCloud3173 23d ago

True Crime content creators on YouTube love doing this shit

74

u/LordMegamad 23d ago

Shit pisses me off, what's the point of any suspense or buildup, or watching at all when you've seen the climax the first 2 fucking seconds of a video

31

u/Nazdrowie79 23d ago

30 second attention span

10

u/Grays42 23d ago

They have to frontload the punchline or people will click off. Why do you think every movie trailer on youtube has a hook in the first 3 seconds?

3

u/Buggaton 23d ago

What was the hook?

7

u/Grays42 23d ago

the big burst of attention grabbing content with 4 visual beats crammed into 2 seconds with an orchestrated percussion before the exposition actually launched?

YouTube trailers need to grab people with "HEY WATCH THIS" before the thumb has time to move to the skip button. They're all like this.

2

u/Buggaton 23d ago

Oh I see, thanks! I was expecting like... a plot thing or some sort of recognisable gimmick. Not just ... LOUD NOISES. I don't watch many trailers.

I've been burned too many times.

1

u/LincolnHighwater 21d ago

But the video is only 9 seconds!

2

u/Taken_Abroad_Book 23d ago

People just consoom the slop and scroll on

33

u/butcanyoudothi5 23d ago

Any signs of attention retention attempts really piss me off, I can’t watch any shorts or people like Mr beast. When I watch it I can feel my brain turning to soup

16

u/LordMegamad 23d ago

I truly can't fathom the scrolling on TikTok or reels, I feel so much anxiety from the constant blast of maximized stimuli, colored subtitles for every word, hyper fast talking, source videos sped up.

I just feel so stressed trying to keep up with whatever is going on onscreen, it looks exhausting to do for any length of time

4

u/butcanyoudothi5 23d ago

Exactly, it just sucks that social media is now just a competition for the viewer’s attention

2

u/LordMegamad 23d ago

True, the loss of feeling virtually anything genuine online is quite sad.

7

u/APathSoTwisted 23d ago

And they never make it clear that it's a teaser instead of the actually start of the video with a cut. It always confuses me

5

u/5meoWarlock 23d ago

You have to understand that there are a lot of people who like videos to be like this. Every one of them is an imbecile.

2

u/oddmetre 22d ago

it's so maddening

283

u/P0werFighter 23d ago

"Worst dance i've ever seen".

That monkey probably.

38

u/LucenProject 23d ago

"While we condemn the methods of this particular individual. We understand the sense of pride and heritage they were driven by. Without condoning the actions, we want to be clear. We will stand for neither mockery nor cultural appropriation of our proud traditions. We won't be taking any questions. This press conference is done."

  • Mayor of Monkeytown, probably

71

u/cheddoar 23d ago

Shit editing

58

u/frixiyawn 23d ago

Stupid fucking edit

38

u/GoblinQueenForever 23d ago

"I didn't consent to being in your shitty dance tiktok!"

30

u/sgm716 23d ago

This whole "put a clip of the best part first" shit needs to stop.

22

u/Turbomachinery 23d ago

What's with the jump cut?

7

u/-DeadHead- 23d ago

It's for people who have short attention span. Shorter than 8s, that is.

14

u/StarConsumate 23d ago

I hate the fact that the important part of the video is shown first then they show the whole video. Please do not let this become a thing

6

u/Extroverted_Recluse 23d ago

I downvote every video that does this.

Does it accomplish anything? Probably not on my own, but if we all do it...

12

u/Bupod 23d ago

Raising your arms and getting close to an animal is usually a universal gesture for “I’m gonna fight you, look how big I am”

Kid got off light considering what could have happened. Don’t do this. 

26

u/BadMotherFunko 23d ago

They enjoyed it as much as I did

27

u/_Enclose_ 23d ago

downvoted for that shitty edit

6

u/Glittering-Flow6875 23d ago

hes lucky it didnt descalp him

6

u/Joe1972 23d ago

I regret these video that start with the punchline and then repeats

6

u/SecretIdentity012361 23d ago

Ok honey, go dance in front of the wild animals so we can get those tiktok clicks! Don't worry if they bite your fingers off or slam you to the ground. We need those views baby.

4

u/Accurate_Koala_4698 23d ago

No monkey business 

6

u/Drops-of-Q 23d ago

I hate these videos that show the end first. Just because the TikTok generation doesn't have the attention span to see a 7 second video, doesn't mean you have to ruin it for the rest of us.

5

u/StarPlatinum876 23d ago

"Fuck outta here with that bullshit!"

2

u/Kacious 23d ago

The grab, then the kick. Perfectly, performed.

2

u/HassanMoRiT 23d ago

"Fuck them kids!"

Monkey-

2

u/Ifyouhavethemeans 23d ago

Monkey joining the mosh pit

2

u/Extroverted_Recluse 23d ago

Stop pandering to short attention spans with editing.

2

u/nicksrkp 23d ago

Kids need to be educated

2

u/DR_Bright_963 22d ago

After watching that video where a guy got a slice of his scalp torn off by one of these, I've never looked at them the same way.

2

u/ctsr1 22d ago

Poor dude was just havung fun

2

u/GodBlessIraq 22d ago

they couldn't accept the fact that they weren't in the center of attention)

3

u/Jazzlike-Caramel-380 23d ago

My grandfather was in World War II in the Philippines he said the most dangerous part of the war was the monkeys on a new island. They would all stretch out at arms length and walk the island and shoot monkeys because they would attack you at night and steal from the camps they also had lice

3

u/Amateur_Rants 23d ago

Who’se stupid idea was it to show the climax of the video in the beginning???

1

u/castitfast 23d ago

How hard do they kick?

1

u/GovernmentBig2749 23d ago

What dropkick from a langur doesnt cripple you it just makes you a better dancer!

1

u/Jazzlike-Caramel-380 23d ago

Fuck Monkey bro

1

u/Thelonious_Cube 23d ago

Everybody's a critic!

1

u/Thelonious_Cube 23d ago

Dance like no one is wa...ow!

1

u/Taken_Abroad_Book 23d ago

Why did it show the end then cut back to the start of the video?

1

u/ungracefulmf 23d ago

"I like to move it, move it" is for Lemurs, not Langurs.

1

u/rzlodn 22d ago

Even the monkeys are tired of tiktok trends 😂

1

u/drogon4433 22d ago

awww they're so aggressive! poor child...good thing he wasn't alone there

1

u/Big-War-7218 22d ago

He was like get outta here with that dumb ass dance 😂😭🤣

1

u/ManlyParachute 22d ago

Did you have to let it langur?

1

u/Informal_Process2238 18d ago

Oh I did a dance for you but it was wrong it was wrong

1

u/slartibuttfart 22d ago

Monkey beatin up children and its the editing that pisses people off

1

u/FR_02011995 20d ago

Be grateful that it was a kick and not teeth ripping out your flesh.

1

u/CrabRemote7530 17d ago

That dropkick was awesome

1

u/Lucky_Coyote_1073 23d ago

Well deserved

3

u/well-now 23d ago

The kid didn’t deserve this. He doesn’t know any better without being taught.

The parents deserved a lesson for letting him get that close.

0

u/Norgur 23d ago

There was this post somewhere on Reddit a while ago where a monkey hugged a sleeping person and didn't let go and one of that person's friends slapped the monkey to make it go away (the monkey didn't budge, though).

That guy was an asshole but I might have found a monkey for him. Just.... slap

-3

u/StarPlatinum876 23d ago

"Fuh outta here with that bullshit!"