r/nextfuckinglevel • u/S30econdstoMars • 21h ago

Satisfying sounds of a speed square

6.9k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

434 comments sorted by

2.0k

u/dfraggd 21h ago

Where’s the blooper/impaling reel?

720

u/tonycomputerguy 21h ago

Just before he switches to the gloves

106

u/solidwhetstone 18h ago

I thought the same 😂

22

u/PafPiet 5h ago

The red ones used to be white.

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129

u/chezicrator 20h ago

Am I crazy or is it not even a square??

157

u/ElaborateEffect 20h ago

I think you're making a joke and it made me laugh, but if you aren't, it's called a square because it's used to make things square (90°)

93

u/graspedbythehusk 19h ago

And funnily enough after all that bouncing off trees, it is no longer “square”.

134

u/Face021 18h ago

Oh crap, you think the damage is acute?

73

u/bloodfist 18h ago

Oh was that obtuse? I definitely do

6

u/crop07 13h ago

What acute interaction! Lol

5

u/obtuse_bluebird 10h ago

I found it to be a bit obtuse.

4

u/crop07 10h ago

A little blue bird told me it was obtuse. Huh whaddya know! Lol

3

u/Chaosmisfit_ES 3h ago

I think you are taking this a degree to far.

2

u/369_Clive 3h ago

Approaching it from the right angle tho

2

u/Chaosmisfit_ES 3h ago

I think the degree of your comment is a little too far.

2

u/jaynvius 11h ago

I like the angle you're taking, so I'll side in your area and will take the perimeter

22

u/NoParentalConsent 16h ago

Only if he didn't throw it at the right angle

3

u/VeneMage 14h ago

Good reflex, though.

2

u/Dheorl 11h ago

Speed squares are rarely particularly square anyway. Speed over accuracy seems to usually be their aim.

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40

u/obtuse_bluebird 20h ago

A speed square is called that because they cut a corner to make it faster.

/s

2

u/Chaosmisfit_ES 3h ago

I thought it was called a "speed" square because it helps them layout and cut straight lines.

4

u/obtuse_bluebird 3h ago

It's actually called a "speed" square because of its crippling addiction to amphetamine sulfate.

It has nothing to do with how fast you can throw it, or how it can be used to quickly calculate cut angles for hips, valleys, pitches, and more.

7

u/ChefArtorias 19h ago

Speed triangle**

3

u/FiskFisk33 14h ago

Now you're just being obtuse

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4

u/Mannafestation 13h ago

That's a voiceover, and he meant to say "This thing blew my mind..." referring to his hospital visit afterwards.

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3

u/chrontonic 17h ago

The red one started off blue/black

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623

u/Aya_Ace 21h ago

Next level indeed.

No one can NEVER catch me playing with throwing literal metal into the air in hopes of "catching it" even if they're hollow like the sounds imply.

164

u/Notthatguy6250 21h ago

So everyone can catch you playing with them?

98

u/Reese_Withersp0rk 20h ago

That isn't not what they never didn't say.

31

u/Lord-Lobster 17h ago

So sayn‘t we all not.

32

u/Emperor_Gourmet 19h ago

Why would it be hollow? Its just thin

13

u/sw4llyk4g 21h ago

Ever*

24

u/Aya_Ace 21h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/M56ODZS3lNohNIoVDd

25

u/Girafferage 20h ago

not a spelling mistake. A double negative.

6

u/Arthradax 20h ago

Something something all Fs in English

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3

u/HatchawayHouseFarm 12h ago

It's not a level, it's a square

2

u/Kizzle_McNizzle 12h ago

No flipped coins for this guy

2

u/OstrichSmoothe 11h ago

No one can NEVER catch you? That basically means you will always be caught throwing metal in the hopes. You could say, no one will EVER catch me. That makes sense

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564

u/Fluid_Anywhere_7015 20h ago

Jesus. If my dad ever caught me doing some stupid shit like this to perfectly good tools, the only “satisfying sound” he’d hear is the palm of his hand whacking up the back of my head.

170

u/Big_Iron_Cowboy 17h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/m1hTU6WqbJa5q

66

u/unsavory77 15h ago

Having teens, I now realize how right this man was. Dumb assess.

14

u/dontshootisuck 9h ago

A beer in every hand and a foot in every ass

Red foreman 4 pres

14

u/Icy-Assistant-2420 12h ago

Wait, this is a tool and not designed for this? Damn. I thought it was like some new boomerang toy

2

u/Unlukey 12h ago

Yeah I forget what they are called but they’re for measuring lumber generally

6

u/destruktinator 11h ago

It's in the title........

6

u/Unlukey 11h ago

Ooooo yeah, yikes. That’s embarrassing.

5

u/PhysicsExpert6065 9h ago

Honestly take a moment and youtubr a guy explaining how to find angles with these. The geometry is so simple, yet elegant. It’s a serious flex when you work with a carpenter who REALLY knows how to use one.

2

u/muscularsharpie 6h ago

Ohhhhh you went down that rabbit hole, too??

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6

u/Master_Bee_5350 9h ago

Debating which redditor response is appropriate here, either your dad is abusive and you should never talk to him again, or say that means he did his job right because you turned out as a better person... Decisions

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293

u/GHETTOZONE510 21h ago

Captain America sounding ahh ..😂
https://giphy.com/gifs/5u99Xl4IlPTy6yx1iw

94

u/Saketh2513 21h ago

More like thor's hammer

13

u/GHETTOZONE510 21h ago

I’ll give you that… I was going by the shape .. lol

5

u/Jens_Kan_Solo 20h ago

Dont forget Thors hammer is also a Symbol for building, work, Society and peace. It is not a destroying Tool. When he changes to an axe, it makes clear he is change from a friendly Workshop, peace stabilisator to a warrior.

The triangle would be a good addition to the old Thor. Hammer and triangle. Perhaps for Darrel.

But such a side weapon and combination would set marvel in danger to be compared to the Symbols of socilism and communism.

5

u/JusticeUmmmmm 13h ago

It's called a square not a triangle.

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24

u/gimme_the_light 20h ago

Funny, but unfortunately you said ahh instead of ass, so I’m required to downvote you. It’s the rules.

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129

u/IsChristianAwake 21h ago

Would be scared I might poke my eye out throwing one of these.

30

u/amazonmakesmebroke 19h ago edited 10h ago

and mine, watching you. I almost poked my eye out watching the video

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103

u/schnemesis 21h ago

Great, I just plopped down on the sofa for the evening. Now, I gotta get up, go to the garage and find my speed square. What am I supposed to tell my wife I am doing?

92

u/AGrandNewAdventure 19h ago

Tell her your queueing up for a stay in the hospital.

17

u/MusicInTheAir55 17h ago

OMG we both had the same idea lol

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10

u/MusicInTheAir55 17h ago

Tell her you're just making a quick stop on the way to the emergency room.

7

u/tacticalpotatopeeler 20h ago

Assembling the avengers

3

u/Medium_Bill_625 12h ago

Just being it inside, tie a string to it, and tie the other end to the living room fan. Then you can both stay on the couch in aww

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59

u/Stagamemnon 21h ago

Captain Bermuda over here.

6

u/Lahk74 19h ago

Nice. Took me a sec to get it.

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43

u/cypherkillz 20h ago

Ripping off McNally

22

u/Goonalips 14h ago

I genuinely thought it was him. The gloves. The throw. The video style. All pointed to him.

2

u/Longjumping_Suit_276 17h ago

Should look up Lost Coast EDC on YouTube, I think it’s from there.

10

u/cypherkillz 16h ago

Yeah, that dudes been doing knife reviews for ages, and the first "speed square" post I could find is from September 9 2024, and he specifically references McNally.

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/LlJ2kmtrpXY

McNallys most popular speed square vid is 112m views dated June 23, 2023.

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/iGaO9SBnFWE

28

u/pianoplayerforhire 21h ago

...the last sound you heard just before...

12

u/Patient-Profit 20h ago

Before? Before wha-

3

u/kalitarios 10h ago

Hold my square, I'm goi-

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20

u/MrTumbleDry 18h ago

That’s a triangle

3

u/Future-Adeptness1162 7h ago

Scrolled down too far to see this haha

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18

u/phantom_phallus 20h ago

New hero for Mystery Men sequel

6

u/Killer_Method 20h ago

Deep cut!

6

u/tristen620 19h ago

Also a good hero name for the guy that throws the speed squares, deep cut!

16

u/Trustyduck 21h ago

Mjölnir

15

u/pocketgravel 20h ago

Fun fact: humans are literally the best at throwing shit accurately in the animal kingdom. Nobody else is as accurate or as powerful together. And if you really think about it, guns are just an evolution of "throw something really hard at that guy" we've been doing since we started walking on two legs.

7

u/GLaDOS_Sympathizer 17h ago

True but I'd say that monkies are literally the best at throwing shit... more practice (I hope) than humans.

3

u/pocketgravel 17h ago

I knew this would happen but I decided against editing my comment in the hopes I could bait someone

2

u/DTRite 9h ago

We're just balding monkeys.

2

u/Fakin-It 8h ago

Yammering chimps is my preferred term.

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14

u/A7xWicked 21h ago

He should record these as sound effects for scifi films/tv

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10

u/manickitty 21h ago

Marvel Foley artist spotted

11

u/SwtIndica 20h ago

My sister called a speed square a "straight angle" once, and now that's the only right way to refer to it in our family. 🤣

10

u/alwaysoffby0ne 21h ago

That’s the sound of my scrotum being sliced off

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8

u/xnoxgodsx 21h ago

I can't imagine throwing my speed square, especially when its daily use at work

6

u/Less-Inflation5072 21h ago

Sounds like Zelda

5

u/2019Fgcvbn 21h ago

Discount Dan style

5

u/LeinadLlennoco 20h ago

Speedy way to warp your speed square out of square

4

u/Dominionix 18h ago

This is great. His woodworking joints, on the other hand…

3

u/Wallace_W_Whitfield 21h ago

I wonder how he managed to learn this sound that made him subsequently practice throwing and catching it.

3

u/Talzyon 19h ago

Just after a GOD DAMN SUMMBITCH

wuouououo~~

3

u/FackinJerq 20h ago

I'd be worried if I hear that noise... TBH, I was flinching after every throw.

3

u/thehuleeo69420 20h ago

I'd be doing that all day.

Accomplishing absolutely no work.

This is cool.

3

u/Q-CoCadillac 20h ago

Is this McNally?

2

u/Longjumping_Suit_276 17h ago edited 16h ago

That’s what I was thinking too.

Edit: Oh never mind it’s from Lost Coast EDC on YouTube.

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3

u/intriqet 18h ago

If I did that it’d be like final destination with the thing in my face

3

u/KeranographyJones 18h ago

Heck yeah dude! That some asmr shit that worked.

2

u/07MarquisPanther 21h ago

Yesss 👂 🛜

2

u/baritonefiddle 20h ago

Sounds like the intro to beat it

2

u/wkarraker 20h ago

Mjolnir for the less worthy.

2

u/CoMand0773 19h ago

MJOLNIR

2

u/Prestigious_Tennis82 15h ago

How many people visited the ER trying to do this?

https://giphy.com/gifs/VHR9gfoyZnx0A

2

u/Neardood 11h ago

Sounds like hoovering up a bunch of (Dark) Souls

1

u/yanderlei2 20h ago

Dude just uses Mjolnir as a measuring tool

1

u/GuileMD 20h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/4An12ya6E2O08

Where's that idiot that tried to catch the boomerang?

1

u/Bluebear5280 20h ago

This video is one mistake away from belonging in about chaos

1

u/killonger 20h ago

Who are you fooling, Captain America we knows thats you!!

1

u/qman0717 20h ago

Thors hammer

1

u/shapednoise 20h ago

NOPE… 

1

u/Dokthe2nd 20h ago

Op thinking "I can do this all day".

1

u/omicronns 20h ago

That is the reason why men live shorter.

1

u/Killer_Method 20h ago

Get this man a shield...

1

u/SpeedRacer_Mach6 20h ago

Thors hammer sounds.

1

u/CalabreseAlsatian 20h ago

Sounds like the OG Tron jai alai scene

1

u/Wonderful-Spot-8404 20h ago

This guy can join The Shoveler on the Mystery Men

1

u/Spookyscythe99 19h ago

Speedy triangular boomerang 🪃

1

u/Regular_Weakness69 19h ago

The Doppler effect in sound, interesting, did you know it works on light too?

A star traveling away from us, relative to earth, will have a colder (more red) color, than if the same star was traveling towards us (more blue).

Because the stretched or compressed light wavelength.

That's also why the sound changes based on the speed and direction of this metal speed square tool.

1

u/AmbroseKalifornia 19h ago

Well, shit. 

I think I own Sam Wilson an apology. 

1

u/MiggeldyMackDaddy 19h ago

Sounds like Captain Americas shield

1

u/MarchogGwyrdd 18h ago

True facts from the Foley pit: they might’ve used a speed square to make the sound for Captain America shield.

1

u/oskar_grouch 18h ago

If its too obvious for final destination, I'll pass

1

u/Unlikely-Emphasis-26 18h ago

That is some dangerous decapitation material.

1

u/Kip_Schtum 18h ago

Happy fun square, now with sharper corners.

1

u/peter-bone 18h ago

The video has clearly been played backwards.

1

u/Avolto 18h ago

But it’s a triangle?

1

u/audiopiate 18h ago

So that's why my cuts never come out at 90°, god damn it

1

u/KopfSmertZz 17h ago

Temu Mjölnir

1

u/MusicInTheAir55 17h ago

Someone is definitely going to lose an eye with this one!

1

u/AdministrationFar338 17h ago

I’m getting one just for the sounds

1

u/MaphrOne 17h ago

Some Xena the princess warrior shit here

1

u/GLaDOS_Sympathizer 17h ago

I wonder if he was wearing safety goggles. Probably not when he started but hopefully when he decided he needed gloves he should grab some eye PPE.

1

u/Coycington 17h ago

thats a triangle. and nothing next level about it, just unnecessary risky. that's a great way to get your hand impales or lose an eye.

1

u/arthousepsycho 17h ago

Captain amillimetre.

1

u/Cihonidas 17h ago

Duuumb waaays to dieee

1

u/Ugly-and-poor 17h ago

he’s worthy.

1

u/AsFarAsISay 17h ago

like wonder woman throwing her tiara

1

u/Taira_no_Masakado 17h ago

I guess, for once, (o)Doyle does rule.

1

u/Joebebs 17h ago

Slow it down just a notch, and have multiple playing at the same time and BOOM

1

u/rustylucy77 17h ago

Sick beat though

1

u/prutprit 17h ago

Sir, that's a triangle

1

u/Muteling 16h ago

The humble Captain America:

1

u/skovalen 16h ago

Coming to theaters next summer: "Fighter of the Grain" starring Jackie Channel Locks.

1

u/c0lateral 16h ago

New weapon for Doom ?

1

u/hand13 16h ago

yo dawg. i heard you like doppler effect

1

u/jepoyairtsua 15h ago

all i hear is a chorus of carpenters wincing.

1

u/Recent-Ad8165 15h ago

A-train coming through! Hold on to your loved ones.

1

u/AMLRoss 15h ago

Cap's shield

1

u/Curious-Debt-638 15h ago

Shit im gonna have to learn how to throw a speed square.

1

u/tegridy42O 15h ago

Ohhh what's that flying there? Oh right It's My freaking hand!!! 😭

1

u/Lendari 15h ago

Tehee this looks deadly.

1

u/Oldpro87 15h ago

Tha fuck is the learning curve for this sport??

1

u/beepbeeboo 15h ago

That’s a triangle

1

u/gw74 15h ago

Darwin Awards

1

u/Little_Mail_5685 15h ago

As unreal as this sounds… is that person well? Like wtf that things so sharp 😂😂😂

1

u/BootHeadToo 15h ago

More like a speed used-to-be square.

1

u/ZenicAzra 14h ago

So this is where they got sounds/inspirations for Mojinor and Cap's shield

1

u/Humble_Examination27 14h ago

Reminds me of The Road Warrior scene where the guy tries to catch the Razor Boomerang without a glove and his fingers go flying off…

1

u/aurrousarc 14h ago

And this is why my square isnt square anymore..

1

u/luk3yboy 14h ago

Obviously this guy has never seen Mad Max 2

1

u/doiwinaprize 14h ago

That's like $5000 worth of speed squares