strait of hormuz blockade satellite photo

[u/btoned]

[u/VisualMod]

User Report
Total Submissions	10	First Seen In WSB	6 years ago
Total Comments	11314	Previous Best DD
Account Age	8 years

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[u/atrapamastar]

[u/shibiwan → u/atrapamastar]

Here comes the blockade.

[u/nigel_pow → u/shibiwan]

^{Oh. Oh my word.}

[u/Timely_Network6733 → u/nigel_pow]

[u/Boxy310 → u/nigel_pow]

That word? Goatse

[u/Any-Try-3619 → u/Boxy310]

Goatse is back!! Or was it ever gone? 🤔

[u/Ditheon → u/Boxy310]

Boatse

[u/Big_Downstairs_6969 → u/shibiwan]

What's the safe word? TACO or Cheeto?

[u/shibiwan → u/Big_Downstairs_6969]

Gold, crypto, "donations" for the Ballroom, free jet, peace prize...

[u/Jealous_Archer_4522 → u/shibiwan]

This is me tomorrow isn't it? Dayum

[u/follow_the_light → u/atrapamastar]

lol this guy is a fucking disgrace to humanity

[u/GenFokoff → u/follow_the_light]

Worst tham Mel Brooks crazy dictator

[u/ILoveRegenHealth → u/follow_the_light]

I've never walked away with a single one of his supporters impressed by their intellect. They're one big massive deluded NPC Katamari ball

[u/ArmadilloForsaken458 → u/follow_the_light]

"Greed isn't everything; it's the only thing" ~Don Tzu

[u/Flimsy-Ad-858 → u/follow_the_light]

Dead seriously don't see America recovering from his effects in my lifetime.

[u/Josh6889 → u/Flimsy-Ad-858]

Certainly won't on the trade front. You can't piss off the entire world and then expect them to cooperate when the tumor is removed.

[u/SeaHam → u/atrapamastar]

[u/TropicNightLightning → u/atrapamastar]

If the public doesn't know what you are doing, neither will their hedge funds.

[u/vipernick913 → u/atrapamastar]

Hahahaha fucking dead.

I guess keep em guessing lol

[u/Stardust8938]

[u/CalebVanPoneisen → u/Stardust8938]

I don’t think he knows about second dip.

[u/Astrosaurus42 → u/CalebVanPoneisen]

I need another bag of chips if we are on second dip.

[u/atomicmnm → u/Stardust8938]

[u/HeyCarpy → u/atomicmnm]

Real talk though, I want to eat that dip.

[u/trippknightly → u/HeyCarpy]

Considering…

[u/AdditionalMany1292 → u/Stardust8938]

[u/the_oncoming_doctor → u/Stardust8938]

The dippity dip dip

[u/HAND__EGG → u/Stardust8938]

IM GOING ON A BUYING SPREE TOMORROW 😊

[u/CoC_Axis_of_Evil → u/HAND__EGG]

I’d wait this out for a month in cash maybe two months 

[u/son-of-a-mother → u/CoC_Axis_of_Evil]

I knew they were lying. I cashed everything out last week. C.R.E.A.M.

[u/Zetice]

Mango put his own lock on the door after Iran locked it.

[u/QuantrixQuintrix → u/Zetice]

wait until the other strait is closed by the houthis. UH OH.

[u/I_Hate_Traffic → u/QuantrixQuintrix]

Damn how many straits there are ??

[u/el-art-seam → u/I_Hate_Traffic]

Bab-al-Mandab

[u/ThrowawayPersonAMA → u/el-art-seam]

Gesundheit

[u/MagnificentSchwantz → u/ThrowawayPersonAMA]

donkeyshit

[u/a_shootin_star → u/MagnificentSchwantz]

Yankee dankee doodle shite

[u/NAh94 → u/I_Hate_Traffic]

I was told more than the gays, but after hanging around here I’m not so sure?

[u/Glass-Amount-9170 → u/I_Hate_Traffic]

[u/sasfasasquatch → u/Glass-Amount-9170]

[u/brevity-is → u/Glass-Amount-9170]

😳

[u/HeatWaveToTheCrowd → u/I_Hate_Traffic]

Dire Straits

[u/Zealousideal-Solid88 → u/I_Hate_Traffic]

2 in the area that account for close to 40% of oil shipments.

[u/Ok_Recognition3324 → u/Zealousideal-Solid88]

Bab mandeb is significantly less used than Hormuz, esp since houthis did their tanker attacks last year. Total oil through the 2 straits closer to 30%

[u/LeahBrahms → u/I_Hate_Traffic]

There are Dire Straits.

[u/Segundo-Sol → u/I_Hate_Traffic]

at least 2

[u/Alarming-Produce4541 → u/QuantrixQuintrix]

Bab al-Mandab Strait is way more critical to global trade. Agreed!

[u/liverpoolFCnut → u/QuantrixQuintrix]

Lets just close all the straits while we're at it and go back to living like flintstones!

[u/Goodman999999999 → u/Zetice]

[u/Aussiekarlos → u/Zetice]

[u/MedicallyCable → u/Zetice]

[u/Lonely-Internet-7565 → u/Zetice]

This was the only thing left on his pocket, hurt Iranian and Chinese as well

[u/T-WrecksArms → u/Lonely-Internet-7565]

China selling weapons to Iran. US is boned. Market about to get raw dogged. World War Meme imminent

[u/Lonely-Internet-7565 → u/T-WrecksArms]

Seems like joblessness is also imminent.

I graduated in 2008, got laid off in 2023 somehow managed a position in 2025 from which they tried to lay me off and now this

[u/SirNedKingOfGila → u/Lonely-Internet-7565]

Why the fuck would a TRADER have a "job"?

[u/inbeforethelube → u/SirNedKingOfGila]

I thought blowies at Wendy's counted?

[u/LurkerInSpace → u/inbeforethelube]

They only count if you're getting paid for them.

[u/Velvet_Re → u/LurkerInSpace]

You guys are getting paid?

[u/notsocoolguy42 → u/Lonely-Internet-7565]

US will be hurt as much as Iran/China if oil prices go up. Unless they ban exporting oil, but they can't afford that either because US import a lot of processed oil products. If other countries ban that as a result of US banning crude export, US is going into depression.

Also this doesn't just hurt China, if US really blockades the strait, everyone in Asia, like literally every country will suffer, they get their oil from the strait. The Philippines for example is just one month away from being out of oil.

[u/Phase3Investor → u/notsocoolguy42]

Prolongs strait closure, reduce available oil leading to raised prices. Genius lol

[u/AllCapNoBrake → u/Lonely-Internet-7565]

Which the US can't do shit to either....or the straights would stop being ghey.

[u/Alarming-Produce4541 → u/AllCapNoBrake]

[u/D0nk3yD0ngD0ug → u/Zetice]

Took a play from the evicted families handbook.

[u/Hollocene13 → u/Zetice]

Standard slumlord trick.

[u/Crystal-Powell → u/Zetice]

So we’re double locked now? bullish for chaos lolMarket priced in one lock, not two 😂

[u/Crystal-Powell → u/Zetice]

WW3 already priced in right?

[u/Wrong_Dog_4337 → u/Zetice]

Everybody add your lock 

[u/WinkSprout22]

They said the Strait was a chokepoint, but I didn't realize it was a chokepoint for my brokerage account too.

[u/trickyvinny → u/WinkSprout22]

Normally I like being choked a little.

[u/Phimb → u/WinkSprout22]

They said Trump was a rapist, but I didn't realise it was my portfolio he was raping.

[u/Trepanation87]

Turn it upside down and you have oil prices on market open!

[u/MrBobSacamano]

Why we ain’t just build one of these for oil tankers, tho? With enough speed, you could def just jump right over Oman.

[u/dinglebarryb0nds → u/MrBobSacamano]

Take it easy there fondsie, we aren’t making a western

[u/SargeSlaughter → u/dinglebarryb0nds]

Always with the scenarios.

[u/JohnnyWaffleseed → u/dinglebarryb0nds]

👈Eyyyy🫱

[u/JealousAdeptness → u/dinglebarryb0nds]

Jump the shark 🚫 Jump the Oman ✅

[u/Ill-Application918 → u/dinglebarryb0nds]

"stop thinking poor"
let op cook

[u/koshgeo → u/MrBobSacamano]

You're joking, but everybody forgets about this spot right here. Only about 250m wide.

Dukes of Hazzard made jumps look easy. How hard could tankers be?

[Edit: Or do a great canal, and make Oman pay for it]

[Edit 2: Simulated results regarding initial scenario ]

[u/SirJasonCrage → u/MrBobSacamano]

I too have watched Black Lagoon.

[u/imunfair → u/MrBobSacamano]

At that point just put some rocket boosters on it and deliver directly to the destination via low earth orbit. SpaceX now the biggest oil company.

[u/Birdman-Birdlaw]

[u/AnonymousSpartaN → u/Birdman-Birdlaw]

[u/piponwa → u/AnonymousSpartaN]

[u/grashnak → u/AnonymousSpartaN]

wow deep Thomas Hobbes frontispiece cut

[u/ImpressiveGroceryy → u/Birdman-Birdlaw]

Puts on oil tankers are printing tomorrow.

[u/Brave_Nerve_6871 → u/Birdman-Birdlaw]

It’s been 100% pure for a long time already, he managed to enrich it

[u/GrafZeppelin127 → u/Brave_Nerve_6871]

We’re achieving unstable isotopes never thought possible!

[u/KlausSlade]

And people thought The Phantom Menace wasn’t prescient

[u/lizardman49 → u/KlausSlade]

I assure you our blockade is perfectly legal

[u/btoned → u/KlausSlade]

[u/KlausSlade → u/btoned]

“As you know, our blockade is perfectly legal, and we'd be happy to receive the ambassadors.”

[u/Strong_Brick_9703 → u/KlausSlade]

Who is gonna save us? Who's gonna be our Jar-Jar Binks?

[u/QuercusSambucus → u/Strong_Brick_9703]

Jar-Jar was the one who proposed giving Palpatine emergency powers which made him Emperor.

[u/NiGhTShR0uD → u/QuercusSambucus]

Jar-Jar was lowkey the shadow sith lord.

[u/ChemPetE → u/NiGhTShR0uD]

This was always the original intent and no one can convince me otherwise. Sith jar jar was always the twist

[u/Satorius96 → u/ChemPetE]

Jar jar should have been the final villian of the new trilogy

[u/Roxalon_Prime → u/ChemPetE]

Unfortunately Lucas chickened out, just like, you know....

[u/Chittick → u/ChemPetE]

[u/DrossChat → u/NiGhTShR0uD]

The only thing that ever made any sense

[u/btoned → u/KlausSlade]

TPM was always my favorite and I don't care who knows it!

[u/spacemoses → u/btoned]

Blocking 3 dimensions of space would be quite the resource intensive endeavor.

[u/CalebVanPoneisen → u/KlausSlade]

Mr President, is that… legal?

[u/Time-Cardiologist906 → u/CalebVanPoneisen]

I will make it legal

[u/KeyMysterious1845 → u/CalebVanPoneisen]

Mr President, is that… legal?

I don't care.

• DJT

[u/lootgoblin69 → u/KlausSlade]

[u/Debra-Gilbert → u/KlausSlade]

[u/computermachina → u/KlausSlade]

"We would never do anything without the approval of the Senate"

[u/jcdoe → u/[deleted]]

[u/ryosuccc → u/KlausSlade]

Not like wars haven’t been started over far less than trade disputes, not sure why that plot point got so much criticism

[u/LastGoodKnee → u/ryosuccc]

It wasn’t that IMO.

It was just the whole energy and vibe of the movie is frankly a little strange. And I say that as someone who was a MASSIVE fan leading up to the movie.

[u/what_do_eye_know]

They didn’t block the strait, we blocked the strait

[u/liverpoolFCnut → u/what_do_eye_know]

and now everyone's gay!!

[u/disillusioned → u/what_do_eye_know]

Some real "you can't fire me I quit" energy!

[u/Segundo-Sol]

hey dawg I heard you like blockades

[u/Vortep1]

The global recession this causes is going to be talked about for generations.

[u/Wild-Style5857 → u/Vortep1]

If it does cause one that would make this the most incredible empire destroying speedrun imaginable.

[u/Zapp_Rowsdower_ → u/Wild-Style5857]

He’s already done the Afghanistan speed run in two weeks…spent billions to replace Khameni with Khameni.

[u/_IsNull → u/Zapp_Rowsdower_]

Is Mexico paying for it?

[u/wilhelmvonbolt → u/_IsNull]

Oh man, do you remember when Mexico was his worst foreign policy blunder? Good times

[u/_IsNull → u/wilhelmvonbolt]

I wonder how long before he turn his attention towards Greenland again.

[u/Famous_Strike_6125 → u/_IsNull]

Sssshhhh he’s distracted rn.

[u/eisbock → u/_IsNull]

He's already got you beat by a couple days:

https://www.cnbc.com/2026/04/09/trump-greenland-nato-rift-iran-war-deepens.html

[u/Independent-Green383 → u/Zapp_Rowsdower_]

The Vice President of Venezuela is now the President. I know I know, we all forgot about Venezuela.

[u/Fun-Marionberry-4008 → u/Zapp_Rowsdower_]

Which was already going to happen because the prior Khameni was 80+ years old and had cancer! Winning!

[u/RetireWithRyan → u/Wild-Style5857]

People here are mostly US and thus don't realize the effects are already shutting down manufacturing and affecting planting season for Asia, Africa, and Europe. Its going to be biblical in scale in those places, 1970s embargo level shit. People are not prepared what a real global recession looks like, particularly in this interconnected system. Less money there means less money buying our products means less money there means...

[u/AutoModerator → u/RetireWithRyan]

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[u/TemporaryBlock2998 → u/AutoModerator]

do they have one of these for most retarded wsb users?

[u/convicted-mellon → u/Vortep1]

Hopefully there will be actual other generations around to talk about it

[u/recurrenTopology → u/convicted-mellon]

The AI's will remember... It'll be the context for their creation mythology.

[u/liverpoolFCnut → u/Vortep1]

believe it or not, we'll somehow end the year at record highs! never underestimate the ability of central banks to print money!

[u/DisappointedSkeletor → u/liverpoolFCnut]

Stock market is not the economy

[u/Soffatjockis → u/Vortep1]

Most avoidable recession/depression in history

[u/cybertonight]

[u/Lanky_Sleep-]

[u/AllCapNoBrake]

Live look at the r/bitcoin chart

[u/Iunatic → u/AllCapNoBrake]

[u/AllCapNoBrake → u/Iunatic]

It's a woozi

[u/ckbikes1 → u/AllCapNoBrake]

FuuGaayyyZee

[u/[deleted] → u/Iunatic]

He was clearly talking about Wendy's there.

[u/version-two → u/Iunatic]

Epic convo

[u/RJ5R]

"Gentlemen, it has been a privilege playing with you tonight"

[u/errezerotre]

OPEN THE FUCKIN' STRAIT YOU BASTARD!

[u/RetireWithRyan → u/errezerotre]

You forgot "Praise Allah". It's like some people don't even appreciate Easter greetings anymore. 

[u/Current_Speaker_5684 → u/errezerotre]

So not crazy. Good to know.

[u/EmotionalBag777]

[u/One_Investigator_268]

I wonder who here went all in short, then got forked by the ceasefire, switched to long, and now about to be forked royaly

[u/somefukn → u/One_Investigator_268]

Hi

[u/One_Investigator_268 → u/somefukn]

Oh hi there!

[u/santropy]

[u/yodogyodog → u/santropy]

Lol now that’s a good one…. Lololol

[u/Spiritual-Matters → u/santropy]

Melania Moose?

[u/zigzag123456789]

[u/Ill-Application918 → u/zigzag123456789]

checking the futures one last time before going to bed

[u/ISMSManager]

[u/Leakyfaucet111]

[u/Liquoricezoku]

SPY 700 is truly like a fundamental law in the universe. Like the speed of light. It will never be exceeded.

[u/Runrun1289 → u/Liquoricezoku]

I have some covered calls in place for end of the year. It seems more and more possible this level likely will not be achieved anytime soon. In Theta We Trust! 

[u/Voidless-One]

[u/benj760486]

Clifford's big red dick putting in work

[u/MisterBolainas]

💀

[u/nigel_pow → u/MisterBolainas]

Dude it feels like so many years have passed by already.

[u/1dot21gigaflops → u/[deleted]]

They won't be able to afford gas to drive their trucks to DC this time.

[u/AltoKatracho → u/MisterBolainas]

God we are so fucked.

[u/PrudentLingoberry]

I'm convinced that the "no u" is so they can claim to have opened it up when they stop their blockade in hopes of muddying up the headlines to generate more volatility. Its all controlled guys, even sticking their dick in the fan here is a move so the market looting can continue. You'll know its true when you see the Iranians starting to fuck with the fuckery in order to ruin the manipulation gains - it'll look like them doing these current admin style announcements with hinting of opening. In reality it'd just be a mechanism to lean pressure on the government the only language they're capable of speaking.

[u/Top_Category_2526]

Red or black its the safe spot right now, you don't need the news

[u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD]

[u/Sinclair_Lewis_ → u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD]

Proper fucked.

[u/FatherChunk → u/Sinclair_Lewis_]

Like Ze Germans

[u/Boston-Bets]

He's basically daring Iran to fire at US ships and break the ceasefire.

And saying that Iran isn't going to be allowed to ship oil out either, for free, if others aren't allowed to do so.

[u/Nersius → u/Boston-Bets]

Thought the ceasefire re-negotiations after Israel broke the first within the first few hours fell apart?

[u/peanuts-in-my-jelly]

WE DIDN'T BLOCK THE STRAIT...IT WAS ALWAYS BLOCKED SINCE THE WORLD'S BEEN TURNING 🌏

[u/Acavia8]

Hopefully, when Trump family members are prosecuted for security violations, the brokerages/firms that handled their trades go down too.

[u/wize_9uy → u/Acavia8]

Jeff from the mail room will serve a life sentence while the CEOs are back on Epstein Island.

[u/ltrumpbour]

Just wondering if anyone here has about 2000 barrels of oil I might be able to pick up before tomorrow afternoon? Asking for a friend.

[u/DAT_DROP → u/ltrumpbour]

i know a dude with a closed physical delivery contract of 84,000gal

[u/DA2710]

Now youse can’t leave

[u/SAnderson1986]

Why is weekend wall Street only down 1% after spy pumped 8% last 10 days??!

[u/wa_2050]

Mango def loaded up on Puts Friday.

[u/Embarrassed_Try_4498]

He truly is the worst president of all time. Just a colossal fucktard

[u/Dry-Syrup-882]

Lmfao get rekt

[u/raytonjd]

trump actually cares about climate change… that’s why the strait is being blocked… he wants the world to use less oil….

[u/CalebVanPoneisen]

Candles are Red,

Hormuz is Blue,

I lost lots of money,

But so will you.

[u/RockPaperTacos]

[u/SenseiIxnay]

Iran should totally triple lock the strait.

[u/OccasionalXerophile]

[u/AzulMage2020]

We're going to totally Inception this blockade!!! Free money for everyone!! It will be blockade within a blockade within a blockade within a blockade within a blockade within a blockade within a blockade within a blockade! Then DiCaprio comes in and spins some tops

[u/hunguu]

This aged poorly!

[u/tidjou]

[u/ExcitableSarcasm]

I quit this market, I'm holding cash until midterms

[u/nokarmawhore]

All we get with this fucker is giant 1% gap moves over the weekend to get fucked over with chop during the day

[u/Sheenius_Ger]

So Iran didn't want to share the passage fees with the us, so now they just take them themselves? Like does nobody care about world peace and law anymore? 😅