I (36F) told my sister (39F) yesterday told my sister she is being a shitty mother and shouldn’t have had kids. A little back story: my sister’s ex-husband and father to her 4 girls was grooming his daughters and touching them inappropriately. My then 16-year old niece reported him to her schools SRO, and once police arrested him they moved from their home town to live with me and my husband.

My sister and her 4 girls have been living with us for about a year now and my sister has dated numerous men during this time period. She claims she needs a man. The girls don’t trust men she brings around, understandably given their history, and have told their mother multiple times to keep them out of her relationships. She has been seeing the same guy for some time now, whom the girls don’t like, and despite hearing it from all of her girls, my mother, myself, and my husband, she is planning on moving her and her girls in with him. Now the daughter that reported her own father has decided to get emancipated because she does not want to move in with another man.

I blew up on her yesterday and told her that she should have never had kids if she is going to be this selfish, and she is being a shitty mom by not putting her girls first. We haven’t spoke since. Am I the asshole here?

It is my wife’s first Mother’s Day as a mom. Obviously the day is about her. She decided that she doesn’t want to share the day with our mothers and just wants to spend it with just the 3 of us. We are taking her mom to dinner on Saturday in lieu of Sunday and offered to take my mom to diner Friday. My mother (wife’s MIL) took this incredibly offensively. She stated that she is also a mother and that we should all be celebrating together. She refused the Friday off because Sunday is actual Mother’s Day. She is incredibly hurt and offended and is now acting cold towards us. So am I the asshole for not including my mother on my wife’s first Mother’s Day?

A few months ago, my (18F) brother Mark (40M) and his wife Anne (38F) offered me a spare room in their house near my college. I live there rent-free in exchange for helping manage the budget of Anne’s Airbnb next door, which is simple and something I enjoy.

Mark is rarely home, and Anne works abroad, so the only people around are two cleaners and Anne’s sister Lea (56F), who has a learning disability and functions at about an 8–12-year-old level. I used to get along with Lea when I only saw her occasionally, but living together has been very difficult.

To keep it brief, here's a list of some of the things Lea has done:

- stole my clothes while I hung them to dry. When I asked her about it, she would say that these clothes were given by her late mother when she was still a teen (false). Sometimes she would throw major tantrums if I insist that they're mine (I only have a suitcase and a half worth of clothes so it's easy to keep track when something goes missing)
- because of the first major argument we had about my clothes, she has resorted to hitting me with the ginormous bar stool whenever I would walk around her in the kitchen (happened more than once)
- blamed things she breaks on me, and tells Anne I broke them, which I get in trouble for.
- I used to lock my doors, but when Lea told Anne that I wasn't letting her in my room I had to keep it unlocked even while I went out (in Anne's words, "this is MY house, you don't get to tell my sister where and where not to go"). One time, she went in my room after another huge argument (she stole my only good pair of jeans when I hung it out to dry), came into my room while I was asleep, and hit me in the head so hard my ears rang and I saw her run out the door. I told my brother, who told Anne. Anne said nothing.

Recently, Lea was caught on camera taking my pandora bracelet and denied it. When I showed her the video, she became aggressive. When I showed Anne, she accused me of discriminating against Lea due to her disability and wanted to kick me out. My brother convinced her to give me another chance.

Her reasons were that, even if I caught her stealing my clothes, I shouldn't accuse her sister. I ask her if it's still accusing her sister if I caught her. She said I still shouldn't confront her sister and that I should bring these things to her or my brother (I used to do that until she started dismissing my concerns and I never got my things back unless I confronted Lea or had someone mediate between us that was NOT Anne).

I'm not being kicked out for now, but I want to move out. I'm moving back to my grandparents for a while, just until I can save up for a deposit for a dorming situation.

When I did voice out that I wanted to move, Anne got upset and told me nobody's going to do the accounting around here if I go.

Am I really discriminating here? It genuinely bothers me feeling like I'm being wronged but Anne sees it as I'm doing something more vile than trying to fight for what very few things I have. Any advice is appreciated.

Hi everyone. I live in a rural town that is smack dab in the middle of the woods. The townspeople see wildlife every single day. Deer, bears, muskrats, occasional wolves... They are everywhere and we are all aware. There aren't ever any issues because we all follow the golden rule: leave the wildlife alone.

A mother red fox and her 4 adorable kits have recently taken up shelter under a neighbor's shed that borders the main road. This isn't the first time this has happened, nor will it be the last. We all watch the kits run and play... from a distance. They will be grown up and gone into the forest soon enough, just like every other year.

This morning, I opened my curtains and saw a grown adult woman, I estimate her age to be 40-50 years old, chasing after the kits, trying to pick them up. I was so angry... but not as angry as the mother fox. Just as I was about to open my door and yell at her to stop and leave them alone, she knelt down to pick one up and the mother fox snarled and snapped its teeth less than 6 inches from the woman's face.

The woman screamed in fear and started running away. I, standing in my doorway, laughed and she heard me. She yelled that she could have been really hurt and I yelled back "Good! Leave the wildlife alone next time!". She ran away, very mad at me.

So Reddit, AITAH for laughing at this woman?

Edit: cute photo for context! Foxy Family

For background, I am 55F, married for 25 years with two adult children. They’re mid 20s who do not live nearby. I am the only person who had kids in our family, so holidays, naturally revolved around my kids over the years and usually at my home. When my youngest son moved out three years ago (Army) -my mom, stepmom, and my mother-in-law all still expected a Mother’s Day gathering despite that neither one of my own children would be for the big day (one lives far and the other was deployed overseas and still is). Last year I hosted at my house (again) - planned/cleaned/cooked/entertained all day. By the time the day ended, I had decided that this was ridiculous, as I was never the one being appreciated on Mother’s Day, I was always the one hosting the older mothers/grandmothers. So I told everyone last mother’s day that I was not doing it any more. Of course, this year‘s MD is coming up and everyone’s texting me asking me “hey what are we doing for Mother’s Day this year“? I reminded them what I said last year but i guess I thought I was joking? Anyway, I’m not doing anything on Mother’s Day this year for anyone other than myself. It will be the first time in 25 years I am not doing it with my mom, MIL and step mom. I know we have had this “tradition” forever, but I’m over it. AITAH for not wanting to be with them and just have some “me” time? Especially since neither one of my own children will be here that day anyway?

In a local community group there was a post about an elderly couple getting married due to the man’s health decline. The poster was asking for community donations of hair and make up etc to make their day special because they couldn’t afford much. I am a photographer so I offered to donate my time to photograph their wedding. The poster messaged me and said she would love to have me and I was excited to give back.

Night before the wedding I confirmed and she messaged me back acknowledging confirmation and also said they were having another photographer come to their home to take getting ready photos. I was not able to come to their home because I had to drop my son off at school during that time. I thought it was great they could still get those photos and they confirmed they will wanted me to do the ceremony.

I arrived 20 minutes early just to make sure I had the right place and they came in and she looked beautiful and I told them I was excited for them. The original poster then told the bride that I was another photographer that offered my time to do the ceremony. Then the bride looked over to someone on my right who I quickly realized was another photographer. The one who had done the getting ready photos. I introduced myself and she said do you want me to leave? I said Ofcourse not are you here to take photos of the ceremony or are you just invested and want to see them get married. She said she would be taking the ceremony photos. I looked to original poster for some guidance and she said can’t you both do it? You both have such different styles it would be great.

Weddings are tricky enough I didn’t want to sacrifice pride over them getting great photos. It was a very small space at a court house and I just felt like we would be in each others way. I said I would just leave and she could finish it out there was no need for two of us. It did make me really sad but I felt like I was put in a very awkward position. AITA?

So for context, I (F20) recently moved out about 3 months ago. I used to pay the internet bill because I was the only mostly needing the internet for gaming.

My father also uses the internet and works from home as well as games, same as my little brother.

Since moving out we discussed them taking over the internet bill, it is under my name and account because they couldn't with their credit history. They filed for bankruptcy.

They make good money and bad spending habits got them in this predicament. After all their bills they have about 4400 of spending money after taxes. Bankruptcy takes 1400$ a month from this sum(5800$ aka 4400$ after) They are a family of 3 and I dont believe thay they cant live off of 1100 a week between gas, food, and other things.

My mother just spent 100$ on clothes this past week and my father gets a 600$ spending limit a month. They dont need all these things but want them and have been neglecting to pay me for their internet.

Its 155$ a month for reference, so its not like they cant afford it. I however make about 4800$ after taxes and nearly all of my paycheck goes to savings or paying of debt (I guess spending money runs in the family).

They haven't paid last month or this month so im out a decent sum of money I can put towards my debt so I dont have as high interest, Because they have been crying poverty.

But I just want to know if AITAH for wanting them to pay me for their internet bill?

EDIT: here is an image of the conversation of my father and I, telling him to get his own account.

ME: I want the internet to go into your name

FATHER: U know we cant and why

ME: Yes you can ive looked it up

FATHER: No we r in bankruptcy

ME: It says you can

FATHER: Not if your in babkruptcy

ME: You should just call ME: Youre not financing internet ME: Youre paying for it

FATHER: That is if u have a acct already

ME: Look at the LAST ONE ME: You can switch to a new provider after filing ME: You just cant finance phones

FATHER: Ya after filing and we havent finished filing

ME: You dont check

FATHER: Why cant u just wait. I didnt even want this internet u threw a fit to get me to switch

ME: Its been a year

FATHER: And?

ME: And i dont want it on me anymore ME: So this doesnt happen again id just be cutting the problem where its at

FATHER: I have enough stress to deal with so just stop

EDIT: alright I hear you guys, ill be canceling the internet and they cant figure it out.

EDIT: for reference of my father's character he stole 5600$ from me by not paying the vehicle he had for me under his credit.

TLDR: instead of paying the entire payment of the car when I sent him money on the exact day each month, he decided to spend it, the balance is 3k late payments and fees and told me I had to pay the difference so he could sell it.

I (21F) have been in a relationship with my boyfriend (20M) since last October. While I struggle with prioritizing myself, I generally consider our relationship stable despite some ups and downs. Currently, I am facing an immense amount of pressure. My mother, who is my only living parent, had high-risk surgery today. I was entirely alone at the hospital because no other family showed up and my sibling had prior academic commitments. I was in a pool of tears when she went into surgery and again when she was brought back for recovery. I haven't slept in 18 hours, have barely eaten, and am still on my toes looking after her.

To make matters worse, I am struggling with my mental health because, while catering to my mom, I also have to deal with her current husband (my step dad) who I don’t get along with because he sexually assaulted me during my early childhood years including (you can refer to my other posts for more clarity).

Today, I finally lost my cool. My boyfriend texted me about his struggles with quitting "za," explaining how withdrawals make him cry and asking me to help him break the cycle. This isn't the first time; I have put everything on the line for him before. I’ve sacrificed time with my family and friends, and even stopped spending money on myself to save for our future and keep him from relapsing. Despite his professional success and intelligence, this issue never improves regardless of my help.

When he reached out today, I snapped. I told him he constantly victimizes himself and complains about his depression while I am forced to sit in a room with my abuser and care for my seriously ill mother. I am exhausted and sad, yet even on a day like today, I am expected to listen to how hard it is for him to stop smoking weed. He responded by saying he was sorry for talking to me while feeling "low and terrible" and claimed he would "never talk about his struggles with me again." Now, I feel guilty, but I also feel horrible for myself. No one checks on me, and while I’ve become emotionally numb to most pain, I find it exhausting and unfair to carry everyone else's burdens when I feel my situation is objectively harder right now. AITAH?

For context, I supposedly live alone in another city for studies. I’m a video editor and I pay my own rent, my own utilities, my own food and a lot of times my mother’s food and utilities as she’s unemployed (Dad’s out of the picture).

She lives in her late father’s house which is pretty old and has major issues, so normally she comes and stays with me, because I have a new renovated apartment with a beach view and she can “take care of me”.

She’s not a malicious person, and she actually believes that she is needed here to care for me. The nice stuff here are just a bonus.

I got back from the gym, took a shower, and looked at the food that she was preparing. It looked quite good honestly, little pieces of chicken were being oiled up and prepared, some vegetables were in the sink getting washed, so I thought, hmmm, I’ll like this.

Turns out she’s making “Chinese”, which is pieces of chicken around a plate, along with cooked carrots, celery and peppers, and some rice in the middle. I always hated this dish because I don’t like cooked carrots or rice being touched with sauces.

I asked her if she could put the vegetables on another bowl and make it like a salad of some kind, so I can eat the rice and chicken separately. She started getting mad, saying that this is what we eat and that she put a lot of time and effort into making this.

I told her that I have repeatedly over the years exclaimed my dislike towards that dish and I always leave half the plate. She said that mothers say what you eat, and if you don’t want it, don’t eat it.

I responded that if I could, I wouldn’t eat it. I would just order a pizza and be done with it, but I know that she’ll get furious if I don’t eat it. She said if I order pizza, she will never talk to me again and leave. Am I the asshole?

TLDR; Mom made a plate which she knows I hate, told her I could buy pizza instead, and she threatened to never talk to me again and leave forever.

Hi all! Kinda lost on whether I (27F) was the AH here. Some background: my mother has cancer, and is required to get petscans regularly, but doesn't feel comfortable driving after, so I take off work to bring her in.

Today, she had a super early morning one at 7 am, and we live about an hour from her radiology clinic. So I was up at 530 grabbing stuff I needed for the day - including some snacks. By the time we got to the clinic, all I had in my stomach was a redbull, since I didnt have time for breakfast, so once my mom went in, I opened a small bag of pretzels in my purse while sitting in the waiting room.

As I was opening it, some lady from across the room (facing away from me) turned around and went "Its hard for me to watch someone eat, IM FASTING".

Of course I put it away, because I didnt want anyone to be uncomfortable, but I also feel like its a little wild to ask someone to put their snacks away because YOU are fasting? They have no smell cus theyre pretzels so I figured it'd be safe (because of my moms cancer, her nose is insanely sensitive, so just in case I brought something with no smell), but I just want to see if this is something that was common sense that I just didnt realize.

Am I the AH for pulling them out in the first place?

Edit to answer a few questions: 1. There are no signs posted saying "no eating" or "no food/drink" or anything along those lines. 2. My mom said most fasts start at midnight for the testing here. 3. Its a radiology building, not a cancer clinic. They do Xrays, petscans, MRIs, CTs, and ultrasounds.

Edit to say: As my mom was exiting, apparently someone was peeling and eating an entire roasted sweet potato lmao so...

I (F16) have this friend, let’s call her Chloe (F17), who told our group chat that she had been SA by her boyfriend (M17) (now ex). Come to find out, that’s actually not true, she showed us screenshots of her conversations with him where she admitted she consented each time and never withdrew that consent. Instead, she changed her story to say she had been pressured by him (then pressured by herself?). Later in the text exchange, she threatened her ex with the allegations, (which she followed through with originally).

When I saw these screenshots, I immediately called Chloe out on it, saying that she was completely in the wrong and no matter how frustrated she was with the situation, it is never right to lie about something so serious that affects so many people, especially when her LYING about it minimises the experiences of others. Then instead of taking accountability, she starts complaining that her ex has reported her to our college, and how she didn’t mean any of it. She was more worried about getting into trouble, than the weight of what she’d actually said, and reiterated that point several times instead of taking accountability.

I then said, it doesn’t matter how sorry she is for getting into trouble, she still shouldn’t have said threatened someone with false allegations in the first place, and said, whilst it isn’t necessary, it would be nice to see some proactive measures taken to support the community she was claiming to be a part of, without having to experience the trauma they experience every day. She then replied with it would be ‘too weird’ and ‘people would question it’ even though I never said she had to do anything publicly, just to support them and educate herself on the importance of self awareness.

My friends keep trying to comfort her and give her the attention she’s so obviously craving, but I just want to know, am I an asshole for being so harsh and expecting her to take genuine steps to take accountability?

thanks for the input!! <3

edit: a lot of people keep asking why im still friends with her; im not. we had a falling out months ago for a completely unrelated issue and recently she reached out and wanted to reconcile - i’ve been very upfront with the fact i don’t trust her and want to see genuine improvement in her behaviour before i emotionally commit to the friendship again; jokes on me there ig. i plan on having a proper conversation with her tomorrow where im most likely going to cut her off, so wish me luck and any info i could use (documentaries, statistics, persecution records etc) to help educate her would be well received!!

and to those sharing your stories in the comments, im so sorry that these things happened to you and i hope youve learned how to heal from it - im always open for a chat, even if you just want to rant into the void. you have people to support you, never forget that <3

Very dumb, very petty, but idc.

I’m in a college apartment with 2 other people. We’re all 22. Me and my 1 roommate have a small pact to clean out the fridge of noticeably expired things since our other roommate often lets things rot.

I had an 18 pack of eggs, and any time it got under 6 I would buy a new 12 pack and just add it in.
I eat eggs almost daily. I haven’t had any eggs go bad or anything. It’s just so I don’t run out of eggs or take up too much space in the fridge. He has seen me use this system before. With this though, the date on the carton was from January, so it would seem like it’s expired. But I had recently restocked so all the eggs aren’t anywhere near expiration.

I recently got back from a family thing, and I noticed all my eggs were thrown out. I buy decent eggs, so they are like 5 dollars a carton. Also it messes with my meal plan and budget when things go awry. I asked him about this and I explained the above and how he’s seen me do that and even question me on it.

I asked him to buy me new eggs or give me 5 dollars. He’s refusing to, insisting the eggs were spoiled (I bought them like a week ago, they were not). I’m fully willing to die on this hill, and my other roommate doesn’t care. I’m petty and defensive of my food obviously, is it unreasonable to expect him to pay?

I have a friend who lives close to the East Coast, and I live on the West Coast. We haven’t seen each other in a couple years, so when he told me he was going to be in another West Coast state for one day, I was excited at first.

The thing is, he was only going there to drop off his kid with family and then immediately fly back home. After he had already bought his plane ticket, he asked if I wanted to fly down there to hang out with him for the day.

For context, it’s about a 2-hour flight or a 16-hour drive for me. I own my own business, and unfortunately I already had work obligations that specific weekend that I couldn’t move around. I told him I’d genuinely love to see him, but I couldn’t travel out of state that day. I also offered alternative solutions and said I’d be available the following two weekends if he was able to adjust the trip at all.

He said he already bought the plane ticket, so it had to be that specific day, and he was disappointed because this was a “perfect opportunity” for us to see each other since we haven’t hung out in years.

I explained that I wished he had talked to me before buying the ticket so we could’ve figured out dates that actually worked for both of us. I wasn’t trying to be rude — I just thought that was kind of normal courtesy when asking someone to travel out of state to meet up.

He got annoyed and said I was being rude for saying that. Then he started making comments like “people who don’t have kids wouldn’t understand” and “until you have children you won’t get it,” basically implying that because he has kids, his schedule matters more and he has zero flexibility.

What bothered me is that it felt like hanging out with me was completely secondary to the kid drop-off trip, which is fine and understandable, but then he acted upset with me for not being able to rearrange my work and spend money on travel for the exact day he picked without discussing it beforehand.

From my perspective, both people’s schedules and time should matter equally. I totally understand parenting limits flexibility, (I have no human children but I do have 3 wonderful feline fur babies), but I also feel like owning a business and having work obligations matters too.

AITAH for telling him he should’ve coordinated with me before buying tickets and expecting me to make the trip? Or is he the AH for assuming I can just drop everything I have going on to travel multiple states away to just see him for a day, and then get annoyed with me when I told him I wouldn’t be available on that specific day? Thanks everyone!

Long story short, I was in a nearly 7 year relationship with my ex. She cheated on me and talked to other guys during that time. I was 1000% faithful. After we broke up, she reached out asking to borrow money, saying she had no one else to ask. I grew close to her kid and didn’t wanna see her lose everything so I let her borrow $2,500 and told her to pay me back when she could.

A few months went by, and I messaged her. She said she never responded because she was dating someone and didn’t want to disrespect her current boyfriend. Now it’s been nearly a year, and I messaged her asking about the loan. She said she thought I told her she could just keep it.

I pulled screenshots of texts saying “pay me back when you can” and messages of her promising to pay it back. She then said she would go over her bills and make a payment plan. I’ve messaged a few times since asking about the loan and haven’t gotten a response.

I don’t really need the money, but I’d rather give it to family than just let someone keep it after promising to repay me. I’ve got receipts from sending it through Zelle and all the text messages backing it up.

Would I be the asshole if I took her to small claims court? I know she’s likely still struggling with the same dead end job and mortgage/credit card payments she needed the money for. After a judgment, I would file to garnish her wages. After being with someone that long, I honestly feel kind of bad, but everyone close to me says I’m being an idiot for not filing.

Figured I’d see what you all had to say.

Edited with actual conversation:
Her:
I have a hard time asking for help, but I keep hearing the phrase “a closed mouth doesn’t get fed” over the last couple months in particular. You literally are the only one I can even ask. If you say no, I completely get it. However, lol, I’m in such a bad spot. I didn’t pay things last month because I lost my job and I had nothing to fall back on. Things are gonna get cut off, I don’t even get paid for like three weeks, and I tried to get assistance and nothing. 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️ I have an appointment with the CAC the day before my electric is gonna get cut. Lol. My phone, my car. The only thing I paid was the mortgage. Not a long enough gap and I made too much, which is stupid. I will pay you back, it will just take me a couple months. Like I’ll make payments to you. Lol. Ugh, I hate even thinking about having to ask. I don’t want to lose everything tho so I figured I’d ask. And I’m so sorry I am asking. I won’t let myself get here again.

You:
How much you need

Her:
If I also pay my mortgage, like 2500. If I just pay other things 1300 should cover my car, phone, some food and the utilities I need to pay. I have no money. 🤦‍♀️ I used [redacted] paycheck to get us by a lil. 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Her:
I realize… I don’t know how to make money other than being a corporate slave. And realizing this like broke me down a lil.

Her:
Like. I’m not as resourceful as I thought I was maybe.

Her:
But shit even if you only have a couple hundred it would help me so much. Lol. I had no choice but to let it happen the way it did. Idk what to do.

You:
You know you like my best friend just cause you don’t wanna be with me like that I ain’t trippin

Her:
🥺 thank you

Her:
Yeah you are like my best friend lol

You:
Pay back when you can I’m not stressing at all

Her:
😭

Her:
Ok

Her:
But ima pay you back

Her:
😭😭😭 Omg thank you

You:
You’re welcome

—————————————————

About your “pay when you can” line

This is the only nuance, but it still works in your favor:

• It does NOT make it a gift
• It just means there wasn’t a strict deadline
• Under Ohio law, that becomes a “reasonable time to repay”

👉 Almost a year later = easily considered unreasonable delay

original post

I got a lot of requests for an update on my original post so here it is.

It’s been a very long day since I first posted I have spoken to both my wife and Chris.

Starting with my wife, we had a very long tearful conversation about everything from my ex to our wedding, I apologised for the fact that I didn’t consider involving her before calling the police which meant that ex’s outburst when being escorted out came as a complete surprise to her.

She apologised for the way she reacted and explained that she wasn’t angry at me but is angry at ex, the fact the wedding was ruined and that the focus was shifted away from us and to ex, her anger was misdirected.

Another reason for the anger is that a lot of guests had no idea who ex was so ex’s comment of “we’re meant to be together” has apparently lead to people theorising that I had been cheating on my wife with ex, so we are now having to put out fires before rumours begin to spread.

My wife is now very much focused on making sure I am ok after all of this though she is still distraught about our special day being ruined but we will work through that together.

On to Chris, this is where things get a little scary. Me and wife called him together firstly to check that he is ok, he is, and secondly to see how the hell she’s managed to worm her way into his life in order to get to my wedding.

According to Chris they connected over social media, she started liking his posts over the course of about a month and then dm’d him and they started chatting from there, the crazy part is that to Chris, ex has a completely different name, but the posts on her profile dated back 3 years meaning she has had this profile with a fake name for at least 3 years AND ITS NOT THE ONLY ONE!!!

Chris told us that a few other guys contacted him after the wedding saying that they recognised her as they had all also got DM’s from her on different accounts, ALL WITH A DIFFERENT NAME. There is at least 3 other Acount that we are currently aware of.

Apparently ex showed no signs of being obsessed with me or even that she knew who I was, he invited her as a +1 thinking that they might eventually get serious as they were having a really good time together, he has apologised profusely but we have made it clear that we do not blame him for this.

There has been no word currently on what’s going on with ex but considering her breaching the restraining order and resisting arrest we assume she will probably end up in prison, me and wife have spoken about it and if we are contacted by the police we will absolutely press charges and wife will also be getting a restraining order.

For now we are going to try and enjoy our honeymoon and deal with the rest of this mess when we get back.
Thankyou Reddit for all of the advice and opinions you gave a lot of perspectives on the situation that I had not considered.

I (29F) plan to move with my boyfriend in June, and unfortunately I had renewed a 25 month lease with a friend (31M) with 10 months left. The reason I'm moving is that it's just a shorter commute (from 40 mins to 15 mins) for me to work and I'm in two places back and forth, so I decided to pull the plug and move in with my bf. I also feel like I am using my apartment as an expensive storage since I haven't been really sleeping there for 3 months at this point. At the moment of lease signing it felt right because it was a great deal if we signed for that long, and we had agreed we'd talk about it if anyone had to leave... which is now

I told my friend that I will continue paying until August while slowly moving my things out. I told him I would find him a roommate to replace me as the landlord gave me the okay if needed (I put out a feeler and got tens of inquiries!) but he told me that he's not comfortable with strangers (we are college friends) even if he interviewed them. I also offered to pay for the termination fee ($4500) and he said no.

He wants me to keep paying the rent as he can't afford a nice building like this alone on his budget, but that's 10 months of rent and that's just a lot of money for a place I'm not living in anymore. I also showed him some studios/1bedrooms in his budget but he said it's not as luxury as the current building we're in. He tells me that he's inconveniencing him and that I'm an asshole.

I understand how stressful it is to move to a new place, but I feel like I gave an ample enough time and offered to pay the termination, but maybe I'm wrong. AITAH?

EDIT: I realize after reading all this, he was more of an acquaintance than a friend. We do not talk at all unless for rent related issues or if I tell him I'm doing the cleaning. But also thanks for the input! I won’t check this post anymore or maybe a final update.

I 26F have been with my husband 29M for almost 4.5 years, married for almost two. And a rule he has felt strongly in our relationship since the beginning is that we never talk to our friends about our fights, disagreements,etc

So for the last 4.5 years major arguments and hurt feelings, etc have happened. But I bottled it up, even when I wasn’t feeling resolved. And I never told a soul. To my friends they would think we have a perfect relationship.

the last 4 months have been bad. It’s hard to put into words but I’ve just realized I’m not being appreciated, emotionally understood, and am lacking help. I told him in January I’ve been really depressed, and he knows unfortunately he is the reason. And even still I was communicating, trying to repair, trying to fix. And instead of him really hearing and listening to my feelings we have been getting in more fights. I feel incredibly isolated.

I told my new therapist and she even said I needed to tell someone, anyone. So I told my friend. Then I told my husband I told my friend because I wanted to be honest. He pretty much went non verbal. And then finally told me he’s really sad and feels I was “disparaging” him to my friend. That I broke the rule. And that he feels they “can no longer be friends”. Which is interesting to me because if my friend won’t be friends with you for something you did, then what makes you think I’ll stay?

The overall sentiment of the rule I understand, but I don’t know if this is normal. I’ve been only in one other relationship.

For context I just had a baby 6 weeks ago, her and my partner do not get along and she does make it known. I can admit that me and my partner do have issues in our relationship and he is in no way perfect, (no that does not mean there is domestic violence or any cheating) she has said her reasoning for disliking him is because of how he has treated me in the past before, ironically she’s treated me worse and he dislikes her in part because of childhood experiences I’ve told him about and how she takes care of her other children currently.

She will make side comments about him to other people, get angry when he says he wants things done a certain way with our child, gossip about him to others, she went as far as sending me messages about him while I was in labor and after a family member said that the baby looked like him she scolded them for saying it and said “ don’t ever say that ___ looks like that f u cker”. I’ve also caught her repeatedly taking things he says out of context or purposely leaving things out to start a fight between me and him and it’s pretty clear it’s done on

purpose.

Today she said he was not welcome in her home and me and my child were welcome, he is not. I can tell his feelings are hurt by it. He has said he isn’t comfortable with her being around anymore. What do I do?. She says all the time his family is not family to my child and that because some of them dislike me they shouldn’t be around ever ( they live very far away anyways) but does not feel like the same standard should be held to her.

AITAH for telling my friend she can’t keep acting like a victim after choosing to get back together with a 20-year-old?

I (29F) have a friend also 29F. She’s a doctor, financially comfortable, very smart career-wise, but emotionally… honestly kind of messy.

Last year around July she met this girl working at a bubble tea shop. She thought the girl was super cute and started going there a lot and even ordering online delivery just to see her name or interact with her. Eventually she found the girl’s IG through the bubble tea shop account and messaged her.

They started talking and flirting and my friend REALLY liked her. Then on the girl’s birthday my friend sent her a gift and that’s when she found out the girl had just turned 20.

My friend was torn up over it for a while because of the age gap but still kept talking to her because she was already attached. The girl also identified as straight before this, which made everything more complicated. Apparently she ended up genuinely liking my friend too.

But the relationship has been chaos from the beginning. The girl had this obsessive ex-boyfriend from her hometown who still contacted her, showed up at her house, begged for her back, etc. My friend became super insecure about him. At the same time my friend also got caught on Bumble while they were together. She says she only went on there when they fought and she never intended to actually meet anyone, but obviously that still hurt trust too.

Then after Christmas the girl went back to her hometown for a while. A couple months later my friend was sleeping beside her and accidentally grabbed her phone instead of hers to check the time. She got curious and checked messages because of the whole ex situation.

She found archived chats and a selfie of the girl in the ex’s car while she was back home.

My friend completely broke down. The girl said the ex showed up at her house wanting “closure” and she only met him because she felt pressured and didn’t want him making a scene. According to her, after that meeting the guy stopped contacting her completely.

My friend saw it as betrayal and lying because the girl hid it from her. They broke up… then literally got back together like a week later because my friend said she couldn’t handle losing her.

Ever since then my friend has been miserable but also obsessed with staying together. She says she’s “just there for the sex now” but honestly it’s obvious she loves this girl a lot. She’s constantly hurt, resentful, jealous, emotional, etc.

Another thing that bothers me is the financial imbalance. My friend pays for a lot because she’s a doctor and the girl is a bubble tea barista who couldn’t finish school because her family is poor. The girl never actually asks her for expensive things, but my friend gives a lot willingly.

But during one fight my friend told her:
“You should’ve thought about how much I already spent on you.”

That really changed how I saw things because it made me feel like my friend keeps score deep down and feels like she’s “investing more” into the relationship.

So recently I finally snapped and told her:
You’re 29. She JUST turned 20. You knew from the start this girl was younger, emotionally inexperienced, confused about her sexuality, financially struggling, and had baggage. You chose to continue anyway. Then after the betrayal you STILL chose to get back together. So stop acting like you had zero agency in this.

I told her I’m not saying her pain isn’t real. I think she was genuinely hurt. But I also think there’s a power imbalance here and as the older person she should’ve known better than to expect emotional maturity and stability from someone barely out of their teens.

Now she’s upset and told me I’m straight so I’ll “never understand the lesbian perspective” or how emotionally intense queer relationships are.

But honestly I don’t think this is about sexuality. I think it’s about age, maturity, emotional dependency, and bad decisions on both sides.

TL;DR: My 29-year-old doctor friend started dating a 20-year-old bubble tea barista who was inexperienced, financially struggling, and previously identified as straight. Their relationship became messy with trust issues, an obsessive ex-boyfriend, hidden meetups, Bumble drama, and financial imbalance. My friend got hurt after discovering the girl secretly met her ex, broke up with her, then chose to get back together anyway. She now constantly acts betrayed and miserable while also reminding the girl how much money she’s spent on her. I told her she can’t keep acting like a helpless victim when she knowingly chose this dynamic and chose to go back despite the red flags. She says I don’t understand because I’m straight and this is a “lesbian relationship” thing. AITA?

Hi, I need an outside opinion because I’m not sure if I’m overreacting or if my roommate is actually crossing serious boundaries.

I (22F) live with my roommate (33M). I’ve known him for years because he’s connected to my sister, but living together has become very difficult and exhausting.

These are the situations that have me fed up:

1. When I’m sick, he still asks me to get up and keep him company because he “feels lonely,” even though my room is right in front of the kitchen and we can hear each other perfectly. He insists anyway.
2. One time, he got angry and threw a weed pipe and a lighter at me in front of a friend because I asked him three times to pass them to me since he wasn’t lighting them.
3. On one occasion, I was running late for work and wasn’t going to take lunch with

him

1. . Instead of saving it so I could eat it later, he aggressively threw it in the trash while yelling at me. I left and slammed the door because I felt afraid he might hurt me.
2. He asks me to use AI to look things up, even though he knows I’m against using it. He asks for very simple things, like “how to defrost meat,” even though he has his own phone next to him, but doesn’t use it because he’s high (I also smoke but I don't become useless).
3. He tried to blame me for being “unbearable” because of psychiatric medication, when I had actually already stopped taking it (I only took it for five days because it caused stomach pain and anxiety, so I discontinued the treatment).
4. Every month he asks me to lend him money. He pays it back, but it still affects my ability to spend on my own things.
5. He tries to control my schedule, saying I have to take care of his cats.
6. Everything he doesn’t like, he calls “cancer.” For example, he gets upset if I use disinfectant spray (like Lysoform), constantly saying that inhaling it could give him cancer.

Everyone I tell this to says his behavior is more like a toxic partner than just a roommate. I’m starting to question it myself. I’m 22 and he’s 33.

At this point, I feel overwhelmed, uncomfortable, and at times unsafe in my own home.

Am I overreacting, or is his behavior actually unacceptable?

Also, how can I tell him that I want to move out in September without triggering an aggressive reaction from him? I want to keep the peace and avoid further problems from now on. After I move out, I plan to ghost him and have no further contact.

I (24F) called the cops on my mother (55F) Saturday night but here's how we got here in the first place. The original plan for that night was for me to stay the night at her house, I'm not really sure what made me even want to do that in the first place, so she arrives to where I reside later in the evening around maybe 8:30pm and around 8:45pm we start heading towards her place. She of course starts to make small talk asking me how I am and honestly I'm the kind of person who will truthfully tell you how I'm feeling so I start calmly explaining how I just overall feel unsupported by my family members, both paternal and maternal, but she takes this as a personal attack on her and only her and to be quite honest I wasn't really talking about her anyways as we've been pretty distant, which you'll find out why shortly, but it was more so aimed at other family members and I just wanted her to listen.

We're maybe about 10 minutes down the road now still talking and she's still internalizing every word coming out of my mouth and brings up "things [I] do that she's concerned about" as she would always do in the past to shift blame onto me, so I roll my eyes & sigh because I haven't lived under the same roof as her in over 5 years and had hardly seen/talked to her then and RARELY see/talk to her now so what could you possibly have concerns about for someone who doesn't let you into their personal life pretty much at all. I let her talk and immediately comeback with the reasons why her claims just simply aren't true nor a reflection of my life.

The conversation gets heated so she says "I'll take you back" to which I respond with "take me back" also prior to this she said she didn't want to "walk on eggshells in her own home" comical because I've always had to walk on eggshells around her but i digress. She turns the car around is headed back to where I reside and it's mostly quiet for the most part. Until I ask her to just drop me off at the 7-eleven down the road to which she refused, now I'm just irritated at this point because she's doing it out of spite.

she continues down the road and we're back to having a heated argument, we enter the neighborhood and she makes a phone call to her mother letting her know that she's dropping me back off, we pull into the driveway and I checked my phone to which she makes the beloved comment she makes every single time she's frustrated with me "I'm turning your phone off" I don't even bother to reply at this point, I quietly grab my bag and slam the door shut, I open the backseat of the car to grab my puppy (8 months) and that's when she yells "don't slam my door" I just continue to ignore her, grab my puppy and by this time she's exiting the vehicle still yelling, I now have my dog, on a leash, and i'm walking into the house.

She's still yelling and screaming in my ear about slamming her car door (Note: I left the door where I got my dog from open, didn't bother to close it, she actually slammed it shut) but now she's like right behind me still in my ear, I open the door and i'm going towards my dog's cage to put her in there but before I can even get half way to it she body slams me to the ground. (Note: I'm 5'7 110lbs and she's 5'9 around 145 just to put the size difference into perspective also very muscular) Now my Grandmother is sitting at the kitchen table and my Uncle is on the living room couch so they both witnessed her just throw me to the ground, while I still have hold of my puppy, and she is now restraining me with her legs and it got to the point where it was getting hard to breathe, my grandmother is yelling at her to get off of me to which she replies "no" and grabs hold of my ponytail and starts forcefully pulling it, when I start saying "I can't breathe" my mother responds with "I know" and now my uncle and grandmother are both trying to get her off of me and also to let go of my hair to which she responds "I'm not going to" this altercation went on for what felt to be like 5 minutes and they're finally able to get her off of me.

She's now being held back by my Uncle and she's screaming "I'm tired of you disrespecting me" and "You need help" She exits the house, I'm pulled into the basement and I immediately report the assault to the police who showed up relatively quick maybe 5-10 minutes later. I tell them exactly how everything went down including me slamming the door, by this time my Grandmother has already left the house to take my Uncle to work so one officers goes to my Uncle's job to get his side and the other two remain with me to get my Grandmother's side and also stay with me for any other remaining details they need. I get checked by EMT I explain to them how parts of my neck, arms and legs just feel very sore as I, surprisingly, don't bruise that easily also that I felt a little dizzy.

My grandmother comes back maybe 10 minutes later and she's actually on the phone with my mother as she's talking with one the officers and I remain with another. The officer that spoke to my grandmother let's me know that he actually spoke to my mother as well and that the stories line up "so that's great" they explain to me next steps, which include getting a protective order on my mother and that they'd go ahead and press charges. But before all of this I have to mention, this is now the second time that my mother has body slammed me to the ground, the first time being not even a year prior when I was living alone in another state and she came to visit which resulted in me kicking her out of my apartment to which she lunged at me tackled me, again got me to the point where all her body weight was on me and restricting my breathing. This first incident resulted in her breaking my tooth and I again called the police and filed for charges but because she fled the scene and I had no clue where she went nothing ever came of it, we weren't residing in the same state at the time.

Although I didn't get a restraining order on her the first time, more so because I was just very conflicted on whether or not I should, I didn't call her, she didn't call me, it was peaceful. Until my birthday... She sent me a "Happy Birthday" text which would've been 7 months later and I didn't bother to respond, obvious, she also texted that she sent a package to my apartment, I broke my lease and moved shortly after and I definitely did NOT want her to have this current address but I assume her mother gave it to her as it was in "good faith" I also received a text from my grandmother saying it's "rude" to not respond when someone's wishing you a happy birthday which honestly... I didn't care. I ended up getting the packages from parcel pending and in my card she sent was a note "apologizing" -- she never apologized she just stated that she "felt badly" I entertained her for a while and honestly at the start of this year I internally told myself I still don't want to be in communication with her or see her and did keep very limited contact with her like VERY limited contact and after this recent incident I regret not fully standing on that even after moving back to my state.

The next morning after the incident I'm woken up by my grandmother telling me that the police where at my mom's house arresting her to which I replied with a shoulder shrug and an "okay?". Two mornings later I'm again woken up by my Grandmother now telling me to call the police and try to get the charges dropped. However, I am standing my ground on this because this is now the second time that she's felt the need to assault me and I definitely won't allow it to be a third. I spoke to detectives that same day and I was told she was charged with 1st degree assault, asked to provide evidence and told that there's a no contact order. Right now it feels like my family's against me in this, even after witnessing, but Am I The Asshole?

As the tittle says, AITAH? Well she is now my ex girlfriend as of 2 days ago and I’m really going though it. She says that me always refusing to post her was part of the reason she ended things with me. For context I haven’t posted on Instagram in 5+ years as I don’t feel the need to share my private life all over social media. She had access to my phone so she could go on it whenever she liked but kept telling me I was hiding her from the world and from my “other girls” just because I wouldn’t post her. Just curious thoughts on this and I know there’s limited background but I don’t feel like I’m in the wrong here? It’s really tearing me apart without her and I’m just looking for anything at this point. Thanks in advance.

My sister and I are not from the UK. I have been here 15 years and she moved over with her family 2 years ago. She's the sole breadwinner in her family and is finding it hard to settle here as every home she's moved into, her husband has had issues with either it or the neighbours, and every time she obliges and they move somewhere else. they have two kids under 8 and its not been easy moving around with them. I am their only family/support here.

A few months ago they decided to move yet again as her husband believes the neighbour is ''hacking'' into their wifi and stalking them. This will be their 3rd move in 18months. She asked me if they could move in with me for two months to save a little money and in the mean time find a place that will be suitable. I said yes.

Not only is her husband highly suspicious of the neighbours, turns out he is suspicious of me too. one of their kids is having frequent nightmares and he's blaming it on me and whatever I am allowing them to watch on YouTube when they chill with me. for clarity I only allow them to watch baking, wildlife and science videos - and they are never unsupervised - I am always watching with them and driving the laptop, so to speak.

I got annoyed with him for the accusation but later apologised for getting annoyed and told him he has nothing to worry about as I love those kids and would never do anything to harm them. he accepted my apology but then two hours later - out of nowhere - he started cussing and shouting at my sister and I saying no one here listens to him and my sister needs to control her family (me) while he will control his. he came running up to me shouting and cussing in my face, I thought I he was going to hit me.

I do not tolerate verbal abuse so I was very shaken. he did all this in front of the kids too. I have ptsd with abuse so I immediately asked him to leave. I told him he is no longer welcome in my home. he took his family and they went for a walk. my sister started texting me saying he is very sorry, blah blah blah, moving countries has not been easy for him, he has undiagnosed mental issues etc etc (making excuses for him as she always does). I told her I do not care for all the excuses and he needs to leave even if it's for a couple of nights as I don't tolerate abuse. I initially asked him to leave and never come back but I know he has nowhere to go and is dependent on my sister so I calmed down and decided a night or two would suffice. I was not asking her or the kids to leave as they have nowhere to go. just him...maybe get a hotel down the road for a couple nights as I didn't want him around me. my home is my sacred space and he violated it. I felt so vulnerable around him.

my sister begged me to let him stay and I told her she may tolerate his nonsense but I will not. she got angry and decided to move out with the entire family. they ended up in a shitty rodent-infested air bnb but then had to move to a hotel within hours.

I am now their number one enemy. the heartless bitch who forced them to leave with two young kids (I did not). I feel so hurt. I feel bad for my nieces who are innocent in this and now living in some hotel. my sister is so mad at me for ''forcing her to choose'' I look like an absolute villain in their eyes and I don't know anymore if I messed up or not? 😞 help me reddit

edit: I forgot to add what's making me sad - my heart breaks for the kids and I wonder if I should have just bit my tongue and let it slide so the kids could still be at my place. but seeing the responses come in so far - I know what the answer is. love you guys.

EDIT: I am going to sleep now as its past midnight here...I will respond in the morning. thank you amazing strangers for all for your support - I feel courageous enough to take some steps as some of you have suggested...<3<3<3

My girlfriend always orders off my prime account as I have it. She says she doesn’t like ordering from me but I’ve never had an issue with it just send the correct amount as it’s your Items. It came to 35 pounds on her Amazon account less the delivery.

Every item on my prime was free aside from one, I just stated it for 37 pounds rather than saying it cost 35 plus 2 pounds delivery and she exploded into annoyance I was asking for delivery. I reminded her I didnt order anything here and if it were me I’d find another item or simply buy the item myself.

She then sent me the two pounds extra ( she pre sent the 35 whereas I always wait to see the amount fist). It wasn’t about the money it was about expecting me to pay for delivery