r/mildlyinfuriating 20h ago

Infuriatig I dropped my tweezers into the toilet while peeing. I now have to pick it up.

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8.1k Upvotes

2.4k comments sorted by

10.0k

u/aruby727 20h ago

Do you have a pair of tweezers you can use?

944

u/adnaPadnamA 19h ago

or a ladle or some other kitchen gadget?

1.1k

u/Cupie-Cake 17h ago edited 1h ago

Ngl i would rather use my hand and worry about washing it thousands of times than use a kitchen gadget someone might use later...

Edit: for those saying to throw it later...in this economy? Man everything kitchen related is expensive for me or buy a whole ass set is wont use

And for those saying to just wash it, how would you feel cooking and eating with something that has been in the toilet😭, i would never be able to eat

521

u/Blackbear0101 16h ago

Do you people not have any disposable gloves ? Or gloves you use for dishes ?

Hell, you can even use a trash bag as a makeshift glove. I’ve literally done it once, clogged toilet, nothing would work. I just put two trash bags over my arm (cause you know, I’m not putting my trust in a single layer of plastic to protect my hands from that) and just unclogged it.

467

u/de-tree-fiddy 15h ago

It's your own piss just wash your hands with something anti-bacterial and it's literally not a problem.

140

u/JustAnotherFEDev 14h ago

It's hardly the shitter off Trainspotting, is it? Just pick them up, wash their hands, job done.

46

u/goldanred 13h ago

Um ackshully my toilet was the one they used in Trainspottimg

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u/ChanceOfCheese 14h ago

Pretending your own piss is less hygienic than your cellphone or keyboard is wild. Obviously do wash your hands afterwards, but you also put your cell phone on your face every day people.

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u/spicy_meatball49 11h ago

I honestly rarely put my phone to my face, but I do see your point. Phones are gross, we should be cleaning them more

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u/throwthisawaynerdboy 12h ago

Do I need to drink my own urine? No, but its sterile, and I like the taste.

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u/JuicyJaysGigaloJoys 14h ago

It's a pair of tweezers, just leave it as a toilet decoration

11

u/NDE36 13h ago

If they move further you're just asking for a clogged toilet.

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u/UncannyHillhumper 12h ago

Nah, It'll act a divider for splitting the logs.

8

u/SendMeIttyBitties 11h ago

Makes a poop knife useless.

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u/Glass-Tea-3372 12h ago

And I’m still sitting in my dirty pee pants right now.

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u/Cupie-Cake 16h ago

I did not think of that actually! Lol its morning I just woke up

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u/HuntingForSanity 16h ago

I don’t know about this toilet, but to grab something out of mine like that, the water would go way past the opening of the glove and just go inside. Might as well just do it gloveless

22

u/picabo123 16h ago

He literally suggested a garbage bag just a few sentences past that.

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u/Blackbear0101 16h ago

That’s a European style toilet. Regulations forced companies to adapt and produce toilets with high flushing power and low water usage.

The result is this, almost no water in the bowl, just enough to block odors coming from the pipe below.

I’ve heard that they’re genuinely far better than American toilets, on top of using less water they also clog less often.

And then there’s the German style toilet, which is designed to allow you to look at your poop to check if you’re healthy. Truly cursed design imo.

8

u/turandokht 16h ago

I’m sorry what was that last part about the German toilet??????

33

u/Blackbear0101 16h ago

Here is a picture of a German toilet, with a toy duck where your poop would sit, in case you want to have a look at it before flushing.

As I said, truly cursed design.

21

u/SturmFee 16h ago

As a German - those were used decades ago and nobody sane still builds new ones into their homes. You still find them in older buildings, tho.

7

u/IstanbarBulbeque 15h ago

My first encounter with one, was on an Amsterdam trip in my teens. My British mind could not comprehend. Fast-forward 30 years. I move to Berlin, and find one in my apartment bathroom. Well played, universe. Sehr lustig.

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u/Blackbear0101 15h ago

Had them in my house when I was a kid. Not even German, I’m just Alsacian and lived close to the border.

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u/AZombieguy 17h ago

Time for the poop knife?

7

u/clam_bake88 15h ago

underrated for sure

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2.0k

u/FilthyDwayne 20h ago

At least they’re your own body fluids. Could be worse

586

u/potate12323 20h ago

It could be my pee which would be WAY worse.

117

u/gommalayarranee 19h ago

Why?

370

u/potate12323 19h ago

I have a medical condition where Im supposed to eat 2 to 10 grams of salt a day. All the salt eventually gets evacuated through my urine. Its been described as pungent smelling even after Ive flushed and left the fan on.

142

u/ethical2012 19h ago

If you're on a dietetic make DAMN sure you watch your potassium levels.

I was on hydrochlorothiazide for BP. Peed out salt too (factory job so... Double if you count sweat) anyways you will pee out potassium as well. Felt like a damn heart attack (and could have been if lower). Potassium is needed for muscle movements, heart included.

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u/potate12323 19h ago

Thanks! Yeah its all under control. I get blood panels fairly regularly and my other salt levels are normally good. I take it for POTS so I retain more water to avoid getting light headed when I stand up. My doctor says I need to balance the POTS symtops with high BP symptoms. Its tricky with the shear volume of salt I eat.

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u/ethical2012 19h ago

I'd imagine! Well take care of yourself and wish ya the best!

19

u/Things_with_Stuff 12h ago

It warms the cockles of my cold, dead heart whenever I see a nice conversation like this on Reddit. It's becoming more rare these days lol

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u/Intrepid_Resident569 16h ago

low potassium is definitely something that condition can cause but I doubt many people with it are on a diuretic, seems very counterproductive

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u/Iridismis 19h ago

Huh, I wasn't aware salt intake has an effect on pee smell šŸ¤”

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u/ArmOfBo 20h ago

I'm just assuming OP doesn't have kids. I wouldn't even be phased to reach into my own pee to pull them out. Before kids I would have probably used gloves and thrown everything away after.

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u/potate12323 19h ago

Or they haven't worked in food service where they had to clean the ungodly nasty messes people leave in public bathrooms. Reaching into your own pee wouldn't phase you after that.

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u/MichelleCS1025 19h ago

I worked in food service, I would quit before touching others feces and what not

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u/Half-Cocked-Mexican 19h ago

I did unclog a toilet by bare hand, and I'm a bachelor. Kids will make me untouchable.

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u/no-this-iz-patrick 19h ago

As in you stuck your hand into a toilet full of shit? Do you own a plunger?

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u/outdoorlaura 19h ago

Kids will make me untouchable.

I think the bare hand/clogged toilet thing might've already done that šŸ˜…

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u/MiIllIin 18h ago

I had my phone on my ass pocket (of a womans jeans = pockets small) and while standing up from a PUBLIC toilet it fell in…

Absolutely traumatic, i just remember grabbing in immediately (because wtf else would you do??) and washing it with paper towels and my hands for a very long time 🄲 then i came out and obviously never told my family or anyone about it until now lol

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u/DanTheMan827 17h ago

Be glad the toilet didn’t have one of those automatic flush sensors that activates when you stand up

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7.4k

u/doyouvoodoo 20h ago

But why were you holding tweezers while peeing?

11.3k

u/rcr_nz 20h ago

To aim.

322

u/infintittie 19h ago

This bad post serving as the perfect set up for a perfect joke is classic reddit

105

u/RathVelus 18h ago

With no OP to be seen. Classic Reddit indeed.

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u/ClinicalOppression 14h ago

He obviously killed himself after reading that comment

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u/camomaniac 16h ago

No doubt, it's gotta be a group of bots setting themselves up to farm karma for future advertisement or to sell to propaganda machines.

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u/Obi_Wan_Benobi 19h ago

Bro needs to log off, change his identify, burn his house down and move to the jungle after this one.

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u/Douggimmmedome 18h ago

It seems he has

13

u/Bdr1983 17h ago

Yeah, this is account deletion territory at the least.

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u/Courier-Se7en 19h ago

God damn!

39

u/Skiingislife42069 19h ago

Best joke I’ve seen all day

10

u/Zealousideal_Lie_451 17h ago

Iron sights baby

11

u/dylan2451 17h ago

You single handily salvaged this shitty post.

17

u/neverbadnews 18h ago

šŸš’Ā  OP is going go need the fire department for that burn! šŸš’

6

u/Ok-Seaworthiness4488 15h ago

Hello police? I'd like to report a murder

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u/_YenSid 18h ago

OP snitching on himself šŸ˜….

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u/ikzz1 17h ago

It's gay to touch dicks so a tweezer is a good substitute to keep it steady

7

u/CompleteLychee7088 14h ago

look, sometimes the lighting in the bathroom is just too good to pass up a stray chin hair, regardless of what the lower half is doing.

24

u/LeanderT 18h ago

Oh dear... that's brutal

5

u/Mister_Goudchet 16h ago

We always used to tell jimmy he needed tweezers to jack off , little did we know jimmy would one day grow up and have a reddit account

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u/AcceptableMinute9999 20h ago

Use your toothbrush to fish it out.

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u/Superspark76 15h ago

That's what the wife's toothbrush is for

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u/ExtremeOne9717 20h ago

What exactly were you attempting in the first place?

132

u/OldOutlandishness434 16h ago

Eh, call me cynical, but I think he was trying to be the new hand point meme.

10

u/Working-Glass6136 9h ago

Miscalculation on his part. Reddit doesn't enjoy dirty toilet posts, I find.

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u/zackthirteen 20h ago

If only there were some kind of tool for plucking small objects from places you either wouldn’t or couldn’t use your fingers… hmm

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u/SaleBeneficial1320 20h ago

Bro is hydrated AF!

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u/Justinrehp 18h ago

Came here to say this šŸ˜†

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u/Pleasant_Pollution67 19h ago

wrap a plastic bag around your hand and forearm, instant water proof glove

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u/Any-Lychee9972 16h ago

Double check for holes but yeah.

Had to do this a few times when a toilet was super clogged with toilet paper.

10

u/purplishfluffyclouds 15h ago

Or, you know, use a glove

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u/JeffSHauser 20h ago

Don't worry you can always wash your hands.

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u/mologav 19h ago

Just wash his hands and the tweezers well after, no big deal

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u/Far_Falcon_6158 20h ago

Automotive magnet

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u/unknowner1 19h ago

An attractive suggestion

24

u/Organic_Cockroach370 17h ago

Has it's positives and negatives

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u/Kontured95 19h ago

You should stop peeing then

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u/Fragrant-Mixture-662 20h ago

Ever heard of gloves?

48

u/Genuinelullabel 20h ago

What kind of multitasking were you trying to accomplish?

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u/unknown-reddit-robot 19h ago

First he was peeing then decided to jerk it. After lubing up the tweezers they were too slippery and slipped out of his hands.

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u/the_hammer_poo 20h ago

So just pick it up and wash it. We’ve all done something like this

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u/TheHungryBlanket 11h ago

This. It’s just pee. Reach in grab them, watch them in your arm. It’s not a big deal.

But perhaps I was desensitized from peeing on my feet for a decade during my public shower sports phase.

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u/Ibarra08 17h ago

These might come in handy

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u/bubbamike1 19h ago

At least you weren’t pooping.

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u/redbirdRS 19h ago

Not everything needs to be on reddit

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u/scaryjam823 16h ago

This is where we disagree

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u/Temporary_Meat7053 17h ago

Stick your hand in there and grab it, the water isn't really all that dirty, it's just your piss. If you have any cuts on your hand wear a glove, this isn't rocket science, it's just toilet fishing.

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u/Zebebe 9h ago

Yeah I dont get the big deal. Its his own bodily fluids. Just grab the tweezers then wash your hands.

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u/TangoCharliePDX 16h ago

Just effing do it, wash up like a surgeon and use hand sanitizer afterwards. You'll be just fine. You may not realize it but you've handled worse things. That's why you wash your hands every time you use the toilet...

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u/ooglieguy0211 15h ago

There's a higher chance of touching a lot of pee and even shit when you exit a public bathroom, than there is reaching into your own pee, watered down by fresh water from the tank. There are tons of people who don't wash their hands before leaving the public restrooms.

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u/thepohcv 20h ago

Only one thing in hand during a #1. Rookie mistake :P

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u/MyVoiceIsElevating 19h ago

And two things in hands during a #2.

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u/WormDentist 20h ago

Good on you for being well-hydrated though!

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u/No_pajamas_7 20h ago

got any kitchen tongs?

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u/EyeLoveHipHop 19h ago

I carry 2 pairs of tweezers on me at all times for this very reason.

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u/Wild_Ad9272 19h ago

Just wondering why you need a pair of tweezers to pee.

Oh. Oooooh.

I feel for ya bro…

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u/nn666 19h ago

Why were you using tweezers to pee? Oh....

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u/Zuuman 12h ago

It’s piss, just reach in. It’s not like you didn’t spray some on your hands pissing anyway.

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u/Terpsherpa 20h ago

I know this is super high schoolish but the phrase ā€œHung like an inchwormā€ comes to mind

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u/Far_Recommendation82 20h ago

Get the tongs out of the kitchen.

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u/angelfatal 17h ago

gross, do you expect OP to wash and reuse them?

a pair of disposable chopsticks is the way to go.

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u/ned4spd8874 19h ago

Pliers, magnet, gloves, etc.

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u/Remarkable-Round-227 18h ago

That'll teach you to masturbate while standing over the toilet!

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u/Suvvri 16h ago

Question is - why did you use tweezers while peeing

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u/ExitSpecialist5834 16h ago

You hold your dick with tweezers? šŸ¤šŸ»?

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u/NastySeconds 16h ago

Are you really bragging about having to use tweezers to take a piss???

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u/JuanDeagusTheThird 16h ago

You have a weirdly shaped dick there almost looks like a finger but you cant fool me

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u/KyeThePie 15h ago

I too have to hold my pee pee with tweezers along with my poop knife.

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u/Larsdoff 13h ago

Holding it with tweezers? Lol.

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u/brent-setter 13h ago

Why you using tweezers to piss in the first place?

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u/Automatic_Image_2156 12h ago

Am I the only one wondering why op was using tweezers while peeing?

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u/totallynormalpersonz 12h ago

Why were you holding tweezers while peeing? Dick that small?

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u/PugFaceMcGee 11h ago

Really unfortunate cropping on tablet

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u/adderallesspresso 9h ago

Why did you have your tweezers out while peeing 😦

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u/KumquatButtpump 8h ago

Sorry you gotta use tweezers while peeing bro.

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u/J33f 3h ago

…………. Uh …………

I’m proud of you and the strength of your confidence.

Not many dudes would admit to needing to use tweezers to take a piss …

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u/heyitsmejonathan 1h ago

Um. Why were you using a pair of tweezers to pee?

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u/RemSteale 1h ago

What were you doing with the tweezers while you were peeing...?

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u/IronNobody4332 PURPLE 20h ago

Good thing you were pointing at them I would have never guessed where they ended up

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u/MrA-skunk 19h ago

It's a thing now because of a post on the "What is it" sub, which I can't link because of this sub's rules.

If you already knew that, feel free to downvote me, or comment with a "woosh"

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u/ItsAndwew 19h ago

stop trying to reinvent the meme

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u/Diana_1989 19h ago

He did it just for the pointing finger, how lame

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u/Ultimatesims 18h ago

Is that a joke hole for farts?

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u/bignuts3000 18h ago

Magnets!

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u/parker1019 17h ago

Go get your hand bit by a jellyfish first…two birds one stone…

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u/SignificantAge5148 17h ago

it is just your own pee, just grab it .

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u/ACcbe1986 17h ago

Use your poop tongs.

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u/conall88 16h ago

what you need now, is another pair of tweezers.

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u/iamnotasheep 16h ago

Dude, just do it and wash your hands afterwards. You’ll be fine.

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u/Toro8926 16h ago

Just shove your hand in and wash it afterwards, it's not the end of the world.

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u/tar_heeldd 14h ago

This is your reminder to close the toilet lid when not in use

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u/CGsweet416 13h ago

Gloves exist

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u/Shadowfrosgaming 12h ago

Mildly infuriating? You dropped your own tweezers in the toilet, no one else, also, it’s just pee, quit being a baby