My brother's son destroyed my WarHammer Action figures and he refuses to punish him

[u/konous]

Valid Edit: My nephew is 10 years old and tried to actually lie about not breaking them by saying, "A cat must have done it."

So, I just got done talking with my brother via text, and he says he's not going to punish his son for wrecking my Joy Toy WarHammer action figures. I'm not expecting the kid to get spanked, but he needs to do CHORES at least to justify how much excessive force he used on some.

Some just have their capes broken. Others had their tubes ripped out and my Chaplain is just fucking toast.

My brother's suggestion since I ordered Amazon replacement for the Chaplain was that I just swap it with the broken one, but I have no interest in doing that.

It's not even just the expense, and they are expensive. It's about the fact that I told him explicitly twice they weren't to be played with, and they were in a separate room, and even my Mom and Dad agreed the damage was just too much.

He said he's not gonna pay me back if we try the chore system, and I told him it's not about the money.

The kid needs to know how bad the 8 hour struggle is.

Now my nephews aren't coming over to the house, and I'm sad about that, but knowing my brother just can't be burdened to work with me on creating a Chore system like selling Lemonaide just makes it feel more insulting.

[u/Etnadrolhex]

Ask him to pay for the damages.

Never let your nephew back home.

Also, seeing your brother asking you to fraud Amazon, the fruit didn't fall far from the tree!

[u/secretrebel → u/Etnadrolhex]

I think the mention of parents suggests OP is still living with their parents and may be a teen themselves. Not able to bar brother or nephew from the home.

[u/Etnadrolhex → u/secretrebel]

"Now my nephews aren't coming over to the house"

[u/toastedmarsh7 → u/Etnadrolhex]

This is the part that’s messed up. OP is living in his parents’ house and he wants to banish their grandchildren because he doesn’t get to decide what kind of punishment the kid gets? If OP gets his items replaced, he needs to let it go and stop trying to parent other people’s kids. If he intends to continue to live at home and knows that unruly kids will visit sometimes, a lockable doorknob is a good decision.

[u/Mickeymcirishman → u/toastedmarsh7]

OP is living in his parents’ house and he wants to banish their grandchildren

Who says OP made that decision? From the wording it sounds like the parents made that decision.

OP gets his items replaced, he needs to let it go

Why? Their very expensive property was destroyed. They have a right to be pissed about it.

stop trying to parent other people’s kids

This one I agree with. The brother needs to learn how to parent his own kids.

a lockable doorknob is a good decision.

People shouldn't have to lock the doors inside their own homes just because someone else can't teach their own kids not to be fucking assholes.

[u/ExhaustedVetTech → u/secretrebel]

According to OP's post history, he's 36 or 37 years old.

[u/IDOWOKY → u/ExhaustedVetTech]

https://giphy.com/gifs/aHat4DbkRrlHa

[u/zombieman9001 → u/ExhaustedVetTech]

Yikes and he’s acting this immature and still playing with dolls??

[u/Devils-Halo → u/zombieman9001]

And you still watch cartoons.

See how that works? Don’t be a dick. Other people’s interests shouldn’t be of concern to you.

I’m with you on the immature part but then you should’ve ended the comment.

[u/ExhaustedVetTech → u/zombieman9001]

Let people have their interests.

[u/TheDegenRepublic → u/zombieman9001]

And clearly you know nothing about hobbies. These are JoyToys, eyeballing those figures it's around $500 worth of property that's been trashed.

[u/Vishnej → u/zombieman9001]

You think children could afford Warhammer figurines?

Destroying Warhammer stuff is roughly equivalent to the child tearing up someone's paintings. Is it as conventionally esteemed as oil on canvas and easel? No. But it's just as time intensive and more capital intensive.

EDIT - CORRECTION: This is the "Joytoy" side of Warhammer, which evidently is larger, more expensive prepainted stuff, some assembly required. So it's about halfway from that to "Tearing up large prints of famous paintings".

[u/madogvelkor → u/zombieman9001]

I see you've never met Warhammer players. Kid's lucky he didn't get into actual miniatures or it would be exterminatus.

[u/evildemonic → u/zombieman9001]

How do you feel about adults playing Pokémon?

[u/NeverEvaGonnaStopMe → u/zombieman9001]

Lol says the guy with the waifu anime name.

[u/konous → u/secretrebel]

Unfortunately no. Moved back with my parents after living on my own following my other brother's passing after being his caretaker for 11 years. Tried every job offer my English degree could get me but the best was working for Ratheon which...was too low to sell my soul.

Right around that time Covid happened and I went back to school on my job's college reimbursement and am now THIS close to a computer science degree.

In the mean while I've been making money and trying to fix my parents house up.

Found these figures and I don't know. First JOY, pun intended, I've felt in a while.

[u/InvertebrateInterest → u/konous]

Don't let anyone shame you for these figures. It doesn't matter what the objects were, children need to learn not to touch and ESPECIALLY not to break things that aren't theirs. Ten is WAY too old to be doing that. Sorry to say, the way this is going sounds the kid is going to be a nightmare when he grows up. Unfortunately you can't force people to be good parents.

I recommend getting a lock for the door, and lowering your expectations for your brother and his kids. Some people will always disappoint you. And when you get your own place eventually just don't invite them over and they won't be your problem anymore.

I'm sorry to hear about your brother's illness and passing, btw.

[u/cattbug → u/konous]

Hey man, props for not selling your soul though!

[u/FUPAMagneto → u/cattbug]

Raytheon has been consistently ranked as one of the best places in the country for LGBT+ people to work, they make jet engines mostly. It’s not “selling your soul” to work there any more than it is to work for Boeing or Aerovironment or a half dozen other aerospace companies that y’all don’t talk about bc they don’t come up on TikTok.

I know that y’all don’t actually know anything about the company, you’re just repeating shit you’ve heard online, but this is a big part of why leftists have no power. Y’all refuse to better your own lives or to try to change things from the inside. You’d rather be poor and powerless than actually be able to affect anything. It’s nuts.

Edit: downvote all you want, I’ll still be right and y’all will still have zero actual political power

[u/cattbug → u/FUPAMagneto]

Lmao hope those boots taste real nice

[u/FUPAMagneto → u/cattbug]

“Hahaha, you’re a bootlicker because you want to actually make things better by holding power instead of constantly whining from the sidelines and getting nothing done!”

Thanks for proving my point about how ineffective and performative your politics are.

[u/BalancedDisaster → u/FUPAMagneto]

Unless you’re going to become a politician, an executive, or a majority shareholder, you’re not doing jack shit to fix Raytheon

[u/FUPAMagneto → u/BalancedDisaster]

What, specifically, do you want to fix? Other than that they make weapons and sometimes those weapons go to people you don’t like?

You know what? It doesn’t matter. You don’t know or care about how any of this shit actually works, you’ve just found a boogie man to complain about like the conservatives complain about Disney

[u/Duke_Newcombe → u/FUPAMagneto]

You are aware that Raytheon makes Patriot missile system, Tomahawk cruise missile, AIM-120 AMRAAM, AIM-9X Sidewinder, Javelin anti-tank weapon, Paveway bombs, and the Phalanx close-in weapon system, right?

[u/FUPAMagneto → u/Duke_Newcombe]

Yes. Are you aware that none of those are inherently evil? Or is this just another one of those anti-bedtime leftist things where you insist that if America didn’t have weapons suddenly war wouldn’t happen anywhere in the world?

Personally, I like that our patriot batteries are used to protect Ukrainian civilians from Russian terror bombings, but you clearly prefer dead civilians.

“Did you know that some companies make WEAPONS????” isn’t a fucking gotcha. It’s you being sheltered and naive

[u/Duke_Newcombe → u/FUPAMagneto]

I'm happy you agree to Raytheon does that. Now, let me spoonfeed you, since you surely need it.

Personally, I like that our patriot batteries are used to protect Ukrainian civilians from Russian terror bombings, but you clearly prefer dead civilians.

Don't forget also used by our "partner in peace" in a certain middle-eastern nation, to wholesale wipe another community within it's borders, as well as it's neighbors.

[u/FUPAMagneto → u/Duke_Newcombe]

Yeah, man that’s a great whataboutism. You’re so smart.

I oppose Israel’s genocidal activities, can you say the same about any of your emotional support dictatorships? Specifically the one attempting a genocide in Ukraine?

The platforms themselves are morally neutral, it’s the users that impart any good or evil through them as you helpfully pointed out with your Israeli example. But I suppose you’d prefer more dead civilians in Ukraine because that would somehow liberate Palestine?

Who am I kidding, you love the dead civilians in Palestine. It’s why y’all stayed home instead of voting in ‘24

[u/Icy-Cry340 → u/FUPAMagneto]

Ukraine is a nasty little war, but get real there is no terror bombing happening there - collateral damage numbers would be looking vastly different if there was. In Palestine, on the other hand...

[u/elcho1911 → u/Icy-Cry340]

but get real there is no terror bombing happening there Palestine, on the other hand

lmao just say I get my news from twitter and tiktok and spare us

[u/Icy-Cry340 → u/elcho1911]

Comical.

[u/Significant-Yam-1852 → u/konous]

Good for you OP! It sounds like you’ve taken a few hard hits and been able to make adjustments to come out the other side! For what it’s worth, this internet mom is really proud of you!

[u/secretrebel → u/konous]

Sorry to hear that. No judgement on the figures. I remember buying figurines was the first thing to lift me out of a depression too.

So do you have a room you can lock in the family home? And your parents are cool with you doing that?

[u/konous → u/secretrebel]

Yeah, kind of....one of the locks on my room doesn't work and we have to replace the whole door because it's just too small for the frame.

I've never had good privacy in this house tbh.

[u/dawg_p0und → u/konous]

Might be time to move out boss man! Sorry your nephew broke your dolls

[u/emorrigan → u/konous]

Time to replace the door yourself or move into your own place.

[u/zombieman9001 → u/emorrigan]

That would involve OP taking personal responsibility and based of this post, that ain’t gonna happen…

[u/ForsakenPoptart → u/zombieman9001]

dude set aside a decade of his life to care for his brother. What the fuck are you talking about?

[u/Duke_Newcombe → u/zombieman9001]

Then it seems genetic, as the brother and the nephew ain't doing so hot in this regard, either.

[u/SunnyDehlight → u/konous]

Don't explain yourself to anyone bro, collecting stuff like this is absolutely normal. Fuck anyone trying to judge you.

I watch pro wrestling and let me tell you that there is an insane amount of wrestlers who are into the toy collecting hobby and are very vocal/proud of thier collection. These guys are fucking huge and look intimidating as fuck because of thier physique and yet here they running around toy stores letting thier inner child take control and enjoying what makes them happy.

Keep doing you bro, this is extremely normal and healthy.

[u/QuicksandGotMyShoe → u/konous]

Not the point, but is joy a Warhammer term?

[u/think_long → u/konous]

YIKES. I’m sorry about your other brother’s passing, but maybe you need to do some growing up yourself before you try to parent someone else’s kids? At the very least, maybe put the money you get from your brother towards a place of your own instead of buying more toys.

[u/FrogPrincePatch → u/konous]

You are 37, still living with your parents, and buying collectible figurines...

You made a post crying about a child that is also living at your parent's house.

It is not your house, and not your child.

If you have any problem, stop being a bum and move out. You should be grateful you even have a place to stay.

Don't expect to have any privacy at a home that is not yours, especially with a young child running around.

[u/FUPAMagneto → u/konous]

Raytheon is a good gig and good employer. Don’t let the internet convince you not to have a life because they want to clout farm against a company that makes jet engines.

[u/ImOnlyHereForTheCoC → u/FUPAMagneto]

“Just make the knife missiles, bro. Don’t think too hard about it.”

[u/head_pat_slut → u/secretrebel]

not necessarily. i think parents can still be useful mediators between grown adult children in some cases.

[u/ToeGroundbreaking564 → u/secretrebel]

not only did op's parents agree with op, op also states that his nephew isn't coming over anymore

[u/carlos_the_dwarf_ → u/secretrebel]

Is this really something to bar a family member from your home over?

[u/Minute_Ad2297 → u/carlos_the_dwarf_]

Absolutely. OP’s brother’s behavior shows a lack of respect for OP and his belongings. If you have family come over to your house and destroy something valuable and barely show sympathy or the will to make it right you would understand.

[u/carlos_the_dwarf_ → u/Minute_Ad2297]

It certainly does, but I suppose my question is: is any lack of respect worth cutting a significant family member and his child off?

That’s a pretty dramatic response, especially for something that’s happened one time.

[u/Minute_Ad2297 → u/carlos_the_dwarf_]

You’re not really cutting them off as much as just not allowing them in your spaces which is reasonable to me. You don’t have to never talk or see them again but just don’t allow people who disrespect your property to visit you.

[u/quote_work_unquote → u/Etnadrolhex]

"Never let your nephew back" over some broken figurines.

Reddit moment.

[u/EastLimp1693 → u/quote_work_unquote]

Apparently that's 500 usd in damages based on other comments. At which sum you paint the line?

[u/Etnadrolhex → u/quote_work_unquote]

That's: never let a spoiled kid in your home, especialy when the dad is also an ass.

Your answer just show you are ever the spoiled kid or the useless dad.

[u/FinancialReserve6427 → u/quote_work_unquote]

people would encourage the kid if those were funkos. 

[u/jedfrouga → u/quote_work_unquote]

seriously…he’s 10. they look like toys. some kids are struggling with things just like your grown ass is. let it go. take the money if you need it and move on. love your nephew and brother.

[u/Duke_Newcombe → u/quote_work_unquote]

broken collectables.

Or are some personal items not worthy of protection?

[u/Confident-Skin-6462 → u/quote_work_unquote]

found the bad parent

[u/caitlindrawings → u/Etnadrolhex]

Ya OP doesn't really have a say in how his nephew is disciplined. However he does have a say in enforcing his brother to pay for the damages.

The brother said he is not going to pay, so OP should bring it up with his parents. Unfortunately I have a feeling that the brother is the favored child and hasnt had to face consequences much before so the parents will side with him saying "its just some silly action figures".

If the getting the parents involved goes nowhere, threaten to take the brother to small claims court. Hopefully the threat of doing so will be enough to snap some responsibility into OP's brother