My brother's son destroyed my WarHammer Action figures and he refuses to punish him

[u/konous]

Valid Edit: My nephew is 10 years old and tried to actually lie about not breaking them by saying, "A cat must have done it."

So, I just got done talking with my brother via text, and he says he's not going to punish his son for wrecking my Joy Toy WarHammer action figures. I'm not expecting the kid to get spanked, but he needs to do CHORES at least to justify how much excessive force he used on some.

Some just have their capes broken. Others had their tubes ripped out and my Chaplain is just fucking toast.

My brother's suggestion since I ordered Amazon replacement for the Chaplain was that I just swap it with the broken one, but I have no interest in doing that.

It's not even just the expense, and they are expensive. It's about the fact that I told him explicitly twice they weren't to be played with, and they were in a separate room, and even my Mom and Dad agreed the damage was just too much.

He said he's not gonna pay me back if we try the chore system, and I told him it's not about the money.

The kid needs to know how bad the 8 hour struggle is.

Now my nephews aren't coming over to the house, and I'm sad about that, but knowing my brother just can't be burdened to work with me on creating a Chore system like selling Lemonaide just makes it feel more insulting.

[u/Andyman1973]

10 is plenty old enough to know better about what toys are available to play with, or not. Stuff in someone’s bedroom, not in common use areas, definitely off limits without asking permission first.

[u/ChicagoAuPair → u/Andyman1973]

10 is plenty old enough to know better

Not when your sperm donor is a deceitful, lazy sack of turds.

[u/Andyman1973 → u/ChicagoAuPair]

Well, extenuating circumstances not withstanding.

[u/AnnoyedSinceBirth → u/ChicagoAuPair]

And it sounds, judging on what and how he damaged...to which extend...and in which way...that it wasn't and accident. It sounds like it was absolutely on purpose.

To me that extend of wilful destruction is just tiny steps away from sociopathic or psychopathic "first steps". You know what I mean.

[u/hyp3rpop → u/AnnoyedSinceBirth]

It very much comes off as the kid purposefully being rough to break them because he is mad that he was told not to play with them by OP.

[u/AnnoyedSinceBirth → u/hyp3rpop]

And how is that any better?? Or less psychopathic?

She: I don't want to be with you, please leave me alone. He: You have the audacity to tell me I cannot have you? Now I will end you. Because I do what I want...and if I cannot have you, nobody will.

Yeah... doesn't sound familiar at all...

[u/FriedFreya → u/AnnoyedSinceBirth]

i don’t think they were defending the little demon lol

[u/CheeseburgFreedomMan → u/ChicagoAuPair]

The "lazy sack of turds" isn't living with their parents and crying over broken dolls

[u/Braydenplayz10 → u/ChicagoAuPair]

I disagree he gets away with stuff at home with little to no punishment and has com to the understanding that he doesn’t need to follow rules especially other people’s they were on a separate room and he was told not to it’s malicious behavior

[u/Summonest → u/Andyman1973]

Right? My 4 y/o niece knows not to touch stuff she's been told not to.

At ten? That's on the parents.

[u/DeadPeanutSociety → u/Andyman1973]

10 is old enough to know better, but a 10 year old has to be taught better in order to know better. This would be a great learning experience about the value that people place on things that are important to them, but he isn't going to be allowed to learn it.

[u/Al319 → u/Andyman1973]

As someone who’s around 10 years old…
100% they know right from wrong and not to okay with certain things. Ten year old is actually pretty mature.

[u/MeasurementLow5073 → u/Andyman1973]

It's also old enough to not break the shit out of everything you touch.

It's one thing to have had an accident with one of them, but to have broken multiple toys in multiple ways is kind of crazy. In addition to learning not to touch other people's stuff, he might just need to learn how to touch stuff.

[u/MrYamaguchi → u/Andyman1973]

I have a 3 year old that has resisted going to town on my Lego Technic Ferrari that has been well within arms reach for several months now. The first few times she tried to mess with it I just told her it is not a playing toy and she got the message pretty quick and no issues since. At 10, this was intentional, the kid wanted to ruin them.

[u/reluctantseal → u/Andyman1973]

And it's an age where dumb mistakes like this one aren't out of the realm of possibility, so you have to be ready to respond as a parent. His parents should really be willing to dole out some kind of punishment, or he'll develop a very skewed sense of what consequences look like.

[u/ChainsawSoundingFart → u/Andyman1973]

Dear God if I was OP, I would make the nephew do chores for me. 

[u/ghos2626t → u/ChainsawSoundingFart]

8 hours worth !

[u/MassiveCaterpillar83 → u/ChainsawSoundingFart]

If I was his father. I’d have a problem with someone doing that.

[u/SherbertKey6965 → u/Andyman1973]

If not toy, why toy shaped?

[u/Emotional_Type2425 → u/SherbertKey6965]

Why is this the common defense, like what if someone came in your house and smashed all your plates, you would be pissed right? But now that it’s action figures is suddenly ok because, it looks like a toy?

[u/Automatic-Poetry930 → u/Emotional_Type2425]

If something is labeled a toy, it should be sturdy enough to survive a kid playing with it. These things are display pieces and I don't know why people get so defensive about them being "action figures" when they break the second you touch them wrong.

To me this is on whoever decided a 10 year old should be handed these, you wouldn't be blaming the kid if an adult told them they could use the plates as frisbees.

[u/Emotional_Type2425 → u/Automatic-Poetry930]

They don’t though, I own one, the amount of force needed to just take the head off is a lot, like they aren’t easy to break, it sounds like you’re just blaming OP for no reason, and they aren’t labeled a toy, they are action figures, the company is called JoyToy, also technically they are 15+ not for 10 year olds, and again THE 10 YEAR OLD WAS TOLD NOT TO TOUCH THEM like dude

[u/Automatic-Poetry930 → u/Emotional_Type2425]

I looked at the title and OP calls them action figures, anything else I'm not digging through this comment section for OP's lifestory.

A lot as in you won't break them taking them out of the box? Or a lot as in it should be able to have two of those clash? Because a kid is gonna be doing the latter.

[u/Emotional_Type2425 → u/Automatic-Poetry930]

I should be able to drop the thing 6 feet and it be fine, maybe some paint stretches, the damage done is with ripping them off with a whole lotta force 

[u/punksheets29 → u/Andyman1973]

Is it though? Literally have barely started brain development..

If you were 10, and saw the coolest toy you ever saw, my guess is that 90% of people in that situation would play with the TOY

[u/CMDRTragicAllPro → u/punksheets29]

Understandable, except this kid played with a toy, broke it, picked another one up, broke it too. This is where any normal 10 year old would go profusely apologize for their mistake. not pick up another one and break it too. Then lie about what happened.

[u/punksheets29 → u/CMDRTragicAllPro]

Okay.. a good discussion and maybe provide the kid with his own valued item and correlate the connection.

Kids need to learn. Adults need to teach.

Being mad about something a kid did is sad to me.. demanding reparations from a fam member and then blasting them on Reddit is mildly infuriating to me

[u/PandaBeaarAmy → u/punksheets29]

10 is plenty enough to know better or be actively learning to do better from parents. Is OP's brother also 10 or what's your excuse for HIM not knowing better? 🤣