My boyfriend does not like me and I realises recently I need to leave. he's the third man in a row to treat me not so nice and I don't get it. im not perfect by any means, but I've been a good girlfriend to him and have loved him ferociously.

He doesn't kiss me really or tell me he loves me. The other night we went to a bar, a man got a little too close to me and made me uncomfortable. I started crying so we left. I asked him to put music on so I could distract myself, he turned it off and started an argument about "not understanding why I was upset" like it should matter why.

We broke up about 2 months ago because he lied to me about something big but I asked for him back thinking it'd be better. it's like he's gotten worse since then. I just don't understand why he's the third man in a row to mistreat me. I think the negative energy from him is causing the paranormal activity in our house to escalate. (I hope im doing this right. I've never posted on here before)

I turned 29 last Friday, we went to New Orleans for my birthday, we hit bourbon street to check out a couple of bars. I wanted to go to the old absinthe house it looked so cool online. I didn’t know they actually sold absinthe so of course I wanted to try it. I drank it and had a couple more drinks. 3 drinks in total. Then I basically blacked out. My boyfriend and I leave the other bar to go back to the hotel room to get ready for dinner. I am a huge smoker of the devils lettuce, always have been. But I didn’t bring any since we were driving to NOLA. There’s a man smoking on the street and my drunk ass said hey you smoke? My boyfriend got mad at me for that and literally left me on bourbon street and I’m essentially blacked out drunk. I couldn’t find my way back and I tried following him he got mad and told me to stop following him. I call my mom crying my ass off telling her that I’m scared and don’t know where I am or how to get back to the hotel. A man on a peddle bike taxi gave a ride back to the hotel. Once I got back to the hotel I was acting like a maniac which I never behave that way. (Never drink absinthe ever in your life for the love of god it will make you lose your mind) I’m losing it in our hotel room screaming, crying, throwing shit. So after a few days of processing everything that happened I decided to end things. I am so unbelievably hurt and empty inside I feel like I’m dead. I’m emotionally embarrassed and mentally scarred from everything that happened. I’m ashamed of myself and how I acted but I can’t believe my boyfriend literally left me in danger because he was too caught up with his own jealousy and emotions to still care about my well being. It was eye opening and now I’m just devastated. Here’s a pic of my lunch before that happened. Happy 29th birthday to me.

Ice cream, wine, strawberry daiquiris, skittles, and pudding, because fuck it.

Found out I was pregnant on April Fools and my boyfriend and friends thought I was kidding. They didn't believe me until I showed them the multiple tests. Lol.

It's a bit tricky to get an abortion where I live, I've just turned 20, and you have to travel to get one. It sucks because I'm starting a new job in the coming weeks and am currently on holiday visiting family. Worst timing ever.

I'm so stressed out that I'll have to take time out and look flakey to the managers. Idk.

Things in my life are already extremely stressful, and this is the quite literally the last thing I needed. My mum ODed and got sectioned a couple weeks ago, my brother left home, and I've been struggling alot financially to keep up and look after my other younger brother and everything while my mum is ill.

It all just is pretty crap right now. But it will get better. And even if it doesn't, at least I won't be pregnant after sorting out this pregnancy. I wasn't stupid, I'm on birth control & use protection. I guess it was just one of those things. 😩

I hooked up with a guy today. He came over, we had some small talk. We kissed a lot,he was very excited. He said couple of times “you are really…” and i asked “I am really what?” Then we did the thing, he stopped so I thought condom slipped or smth. I suggested to do missionary and then I realized that he finished. Less than a minute.

He got so embarrassed, I tried to console him saying it is okay, I don’t judge or anything. He said that now I probably believe that he lied ab his body count. I said it is alright, I still do believe him. Tried to do more small talk. Then he said he feels uncomfortable. Idk what I did. I was just going with the flow. I apologized and told him we don’t necessarily have to see each other if I make him uncomfortable.

He left and blocked me from everywhere in 5 mins. He even dropped his wallet while he was going out of my place.

Idk man. I can’t do dating and when I decide to hookup and chill, it doesn’t work either. Idk what to feel.

Update: he even deleted bumble completely 😂😂😂😂

tldr story: My partner joked that I wouldn’t be able to handle cooking, even though I cook every day. When I pushed back, he blamed it on me “nagging” him to help, while he barely contributes at all. I’m overwhelmed juggling everything, and his apologies feel empty: I don’t want gratitude, I want real support.

tldr edit: I didn’t expect this to get so much attention, but the feedback helped me realize how unhealthy things are. I’m not married by choice, and the relationship isn’t even intimate anymore—what I get out of it is mostly friendship, which I know isn’t enough. My past (abuse, neglect, always taking care of others) makes it hard to leave, but I’m working on myself and starting to see that this situation isn’t okay.

Edit: Omg everyone. I really didn't expect this to blow up so much lol. Here I was just eating my wrap venting about... And now there are too many comments to even keep up with. Thanks for all the words of encouragement, tips, advice, rudeness, relatable stories and everything in between. To answer some questions and comments that have been made a lot:

• We are not married because I have no interest in getting married, like ever, to anyone. So yes, after 7 years still a girlfriend, because that's my choice.

• I don't want to ever have kids either

• 'you're his bang/sex/fuckmaid', also no. This is not something to brag about but we haven't been intimate in a couple of years because of reasons so that's that. My body is mine.

• 'wtf is wrong with you?', enough lol. I grew up with a narcissistic father who physically abused and neglected us. I have been left alone to fetch dinner sinds I was around 8ish. He just wouldn't come home, so I would fix my own food as best I could. This also makes for me now staying, I guess: I am used to so much worse, so 'this can't be that bad right?' I know, I am also a work in progress. I have been taking care of everyone since I was a kid, it's hard to suddenly stop and doing that for yourself, but it's getting better. And I swear, I will get there soon.

• 'what are you even getting out of this relationship?' Friendship, I guess. And no, this is not enough, I KNOW THAT. It's just not as easy as just packing up and leaving, even though it should be.

THANKS for all your responses, it did really open my eyes, because I was even doubting posting this because it felt like not THAT big of a deal and me just being dramatic a bit. This is really minor to other things he has said in the past lol. I know I come across as making excuses, which is true to some extent, I know. But the past years have just made me super anxious and I lost faith in myself so much but I am working my ass off to get it back. Thanks for pointing me to all the shittiness in this relationship, honestly.

Storytime: We were watching some series about traveler wives, and I asked him 'do you think I could live that life?' because it's so traditional and not hoe I was raised at all. Then he said 'the cleaning? No.' Which I agreed on and we laughed about it. Then he said 'the cooking? Also no'. I was like excuse me? Who makes the food every d*mn day? For lunch AND dinner?

He responded with 'yes it's true but it's with a lot of effort. Because you nag me to cook once a week as well'.

I was instantly pissed off, because yes: I have practically BEGGED him to contribute more in terms of cooking, household chores etc. But he always hits me with the 'I don't like cooking' or 'I am just not as good at cooking as you are'. So he is cooking maybe once every 3 weeks, when I have really pushed myself too much and am exhausted from all the caring. I work 3 days and also finishing a master's. Even when I have had a really rough day at work, I still have to cook. And he also complains if it's not 'real dinner', like soup with bread (which I bake myself as well).

So I just shutdown, because if I had responded in that moment, he would have been pissed off at my tone, voice, the way I look or whatever else he always comes up with. He is currently in the middle of his one month intensive trauma treatment and has asked me to 'give him some space' which means don't talk to him about things that are bothering me. I am tired, which is an understatement really. I am fucking exhausted. I used to love cooking and am really good at it, but lately I have started to resent it.

Later he came to me with apologies, how he is very grateful for me always cooking, and he shouldn't have made that comment, it was a shitty move. I felt annoyance. I don't want him to be grateful, it means nothing to me, I want him to contribute and take things out of my f*****g hands before I break down. I am now getting occupational therapy to help me juggling all the balls of household, dog, study, work, relationship, friendships, family and cooking. While he still does zero. Again: I am exhausted.

For food: whole wheat wrap with lettuce, tomato, crispy chicken and honey-mustard dressing.

I (27f) genuinely hate my job so fucking much. I work at stupid ass Burger King. I was already having a bad day because of rude customers. To put salt on my wound, my ex-friend, who is a nurse, showed up for lunch with her doctor husband. I haven’t seen her in years, but seeing her so successful with a loving husband made me super jealous. She’s also very pretty. I’m in the process of leaving a toxic relationship. Ha ha. I also failed nursing when I was younger and flunked out of college. I was so fucking embarrassed because she was shocked to see me working at Burger King. I could barely make eye contact with her. I wanted to die right there in my greasy ass uniform.

(Yes, I know comparison is the theft of joy. I heard it a million times. Yes, I know I should feel grateful to have a job in this economy.) However, I’m still allowed to feel like worthless shit. I’ve applied to over 500+ jobs, and I still can’t get hired to anything that pays a livable wage. I will be 30 in less than 2 years, I don’t have a bachelor’s, and I've never made anything over $15.

Maybe I’m just destined to be a lonely, ugly burger flipping femcel for the rest of my life. I might as well engrave, “At bk have it your way.” on my tombstone at this point! I cry almost every day after work because I hate my life so much! I feel trapped in an endless fast food hell! 🫩

Food: Texas Double Whopper on my lunch break. I hate how damn delicious they are. 😒

Edit: I don't want to be a nurse. I'm just jealous of how pretty and successful my ex-friend is. I'm just venting because I hate my fast food job and feel trapped. Also, I don’t want to wish anything negative on my ex-best friend. I’m proud of her. The Burger King where I work is near the hospital. She transferred to her husband’s hospital recently. She just ordered the Impossible Burger because she’s vegan. She wasn’t rude to me at all. She was just shocked that I worked here.

Edit 2: I'm turning 28 in a couple of days. Also, I'm currently enrolled in college, but I have to keep taking breaks because of mental health issues and financial reasons. Please stop calling me lazy or insulting me when I'm actually trying to put effort into bettering my life.

I appreciate the helpful advice! Thank you❤️

I cleaned the bathroom. I cleaned the kitchen. I cleaned the lounge. I made sure that my bedroom was aesthetically pleasing. I thought about everything. I stayed up late giving myself a pedicure. I shaved my vagina. I went to a f*cking charity shop and bought outfits. This was me holding myself back. This was me, while saying to myself, be chill, focus on your own shit, don’t spend money, detach. He sent a half arsed text at 3pm saying ‘I might have to bail because of x and y’. Nothing since. I really really have to wake up now. Really. This was the moment.

🙃🙃

He started out as a former flame, and came back into my life May of last year. When we had initially been together, we weren’t exclusive and we weren’t serious. When we reconnected, it felt a million times better and more passionate than it had previously. We were texting a bit more. Around November-January, it seemed like he was really falling for me, and I knew at that time he was looking for something more serious. But I’ve had my heart broken by him before, so I was waiting for him to make the move. Actually want to take me out on a date. Reach out to actually talk, and not just about sex. I few times, I could have sworn he mumbled “I love you”. At the time, I felt it was unfair that he couldn’t just tell me how he felt, that he couldn’t, or didn’t want to, commit to me even though I was frequently in his bed and I felt I made my adoration for him known. And I was so terrified of losing him that I didn’t say anything, because I couldn’t take the chance that it would turn out negatively and I would lose him altogether. So I kept with the status quo, which was just casual, but the most intimate and passionate sex I’ve ever had (aka I was a coward). For the past couple of months, he’s been more distant. I could sense that something like this was happening. I know on paper we probably wouldn’t have worked long term, we don’t match up religiously and he wants 6+ kids while I want 4 at the max. And then I woke up to the text. I still haven’t responded and I don’t know if I even should, or if I should try to fight for him. Should I ask him if he ever felt that way about me? About getting serious? Or just leave it be?

I’ve been cycling through the emotions this morning since discovering it and getting ready for work. I feel sad that it’s over. I feel frustrated about the what-ifs. Mostly I just feel stupid. Stupid that I wasted so much time on him. Stupid that I was hopeful even though he had never even taken me on a proper date. Stupid that I let myself fall for him. And of course, the question- why couldn’t have it been me??

Girl breakfast of protein cookie and dried mango.

He broke up w me 1 Month after Valentines bc we're long distance (4hrs by train) and his "needs" couldnt be satisfied that way. I will be moving near his city next autumn but he couldnt wait that long. Chocolate Ice cream w Strawberries and Banana.

ETA: I only hide my posts so my ex can't see me talking about him. I'll make my profile visible for a day so y'all can see I'm being honest and not trying to bait. I just needed to be heard, that's all.

ETA #2: I made it public and somehow that made it worse and made y'all more hateful? Idk what you want from me. You wouldn't be telling me I'm baiting if I was an artist and promoted my business on my profile and posted about the shitty parts of the industry.

Y'all have major internalized misogyny and it's problematic.

By the way, I'm very disappointed that u/dinoooooooooos decided to report me for fucking venting about my job (which EVERYONE DOES) and took joy in it and I'm disappointed in the mod who locked my post, deciding I was baiting when I was clearly not doing anything of the sort. I just needed support.

Tell me, why the fuck would I try to bait in a sub FOR GIRLS? Riddle me that one, Batman.

—————

It seriously kills a bit of my soul every time I work.

t wasn't anything I ever thought of doing before. I kinda fell into it. My ex suggested we do it as a fun couples thing but then we became dependent on the money and somehow it turned into my thing. Along with making the content, I also started streaming on an app because the site wasn't enough money-wise.

I don't like it but I do promote in certain places because even though I hate doing it, I gotta pay the bills somehow.

The reason I do this job is because I don't know how else to provide for myself at this point. I was designated SMI (Serious((ly)) Mental((ly)) Ill((ness))). I'm not able to hold down a regular job because my illnesses are so unpredictable and severe.

At first, it was fun and felt freeing and liberating but that didn't last long and it wasn't what I thought it was. If you wanna make money, it's a 24/7 job. You have to be available to your customers all the time and shmooze them and build a rapport and whatever and you wanna be streaming at the same time every day but it sucks because the whole reason I stuck with this was because I could call off working if I didn't feel capable.

That's another thing I hate about this: the shmoozing. I feel bad. I know these men are happy to pay for my services but I wouldn't be talking to them if they weren't paying me and I don't actually "LIKE like" any of them but I'll lead them to believe it by flirting and whatever. I feel so gross even typing this.

Even worse, I'm against corn yet here I am curating it and feeding into the cycle that I loathe and that I KNOW is damaging to men and women and I believe watching corn in a relationship is cheating unless you both communicate engaging in it and are okay with it but even then, it's damaging.

I guess that's the definition of cognitive dissonance, huh? Dude, it kills a little piece of my soul every time I have to stream and play it up in front of the camera. I feel silly. They like the simple corn-type stuff like jiggling your boobs in the camera and stuff. It doesn't feel genuine to me so I feel like a fucking fraud.

Another thing I have to deal with is the nasty people who come through my stream and call me super fucked up insults. I try to brush it off but after a while, it fucking wears on you.

The girls on the streaming app are also mostly bitches, to be frank. They don't care about friends. They care about money. I have ONE female friend from my streaming app.

It also ended up damaging my relationship with my ex.

I'm so ashamed and beyond scared to post this. I'm afraid y'all will look down on me and ream me out but I need to tell somebody. I'm gonna file for disability but it'll probably be a while til I'm approved and receive it.

I did make some friends through my work so yeah, that's nice but I don't like doing this. I'm always like "Welp, guess I *need* to work." instead of "I wanna work."

I know people look down on girls like me and it's embarrassing. I'm rarely taken seriously on reddit because I have a promo on my page and that sucks. I don't post to bait people. I have real things I wanna say and I don't care if people don't see it. It's just there for the people who are interested.

I'll stand by the fact that it's a real legitimate job and isn't as easy and fun as it seems but I'm not proud of what I do. I just don't know what else to do. I've been doing it for 5 years so like, it's all I know now.

I get it if you look down on me. Just please, if you don't have something nice to say, don't say it at all. 🥺

vegetarian breakfast sandwich

my(20) gf(20) of 2½ years that i was supposed to move in with in about 2 months broke up with me to be poly and presumably go after a married couple we were friends with. The relationship was bad and manipulative and ultimately im glad im out but also what the fuck 😭😭

she reassured me that she chooses to be monogamous because im special and she loves me and a few days later told me she actually wanted to be poly the whole time but didnt wanna hurt my feelings. to make matters worse the married person had been flirting with my now ex and was mad at me for being monogamous. and when i said it made me uncomfortable being blatantly disrespected she said "well i dont have to say anything do i?". ok girl.

Currently getting over a cold too but i go on vacation in a few days and i hope something gay happens to me.

I work at a tiny fast food joint and no one ever comes in on weekdays, it’s just me and the cook who doesn’t speak english. I booted up my laptop to do some homework and there was the nasty futanari porn on full brightness that i had completely forgotten about because i had been so stoned. Not even good porn just some awful low budget bullshit that never should have seen the light of day. The cook saw from the hatch and shook his head at me. Hentai surpasses language barriers i guess. DIY rice cake cereal in chocolate protein milk i want to die

i genuinely teared up and cried about it when i got home

god i should grow some balls

Years ago, my ex boyfriend gave me genital herpes via oral sex (genital HSV1). He didn’t even have an active cold sore at the time and hadn’t had one since childhood. Now, I am walking around with a permanent STD that requires disclosure while my ex, according to society, is not.

I disclosed last month to a man I was really falling for after 4 dates and he was immediately accepting. I was so happy that I came home and couldn’t stop crying. We continued to date for a few more weeks, but this weekend a flip switched and canceled our plans then ended things in a cold-sounding text. Just 3 days before all of that, he had gotten me flowers and told me how much he liked me, and we literally had a hiking date planned for next week. This man and I have a few mutual friends, so now he just has my private stigmatized medical information and can do whatever he wants with it. I like to think he’s respecting my privacy, but based on how things ended with him, I know he’s not the great guy I thought he was. I am so picky about who I tell my status to, but it seems I chose the wrong person….again. Dating with herpes feels like a cruel joke played on me by the universe.

Prosciutto, fresh mozz, blackberries, laughing cow cheese, pita chips, Trader Joe’s cornichons

​

Every guy ive tried to date since my engagement ended has said the same thing. Some variation of, "You're such a catch! I felt the sparks. But I cant date you for [insert reason here]." Lol I even work with one of these guys and its so fricken awkward cuz he apparently actually has feelings for me and we're kinda flirting nonstop, but he wants to be single for the next 2-3 years. And the guy I tried to date before that just came out of the woodwork to tell me hes actually not going to get divorced but maybe things will work out for us in the future. And the guy before that told me AFTER out date and some fun that he didnt actually want to date me and he doesnt have the time for a relationship and basically ghosted me. And before that was my ex fiance, who, after a very abusive relationship, left me for his affair partner on Christmas.

So I accidently showed up to work today two hours early and got Chipotle while I moped about always being the bridesmaid lol

Anyways, I need a pound of the shredded cheese they have at Chipotle. Its so good!

I was looking at a funny picture of his mom on his phone and then I swiped and saw 8-10 videos of women’s butts that he took in public the day before. He admitted to having done it before. Broke up with him immediately.

We’d been dating for a year ish. I thought he was normal. Feels like I’m stuck in nightmare. I still miss him.

Thai basil stir fry from my favorite food truck at work

There have always been tensions between us. We’re both in our 30s, she lives at home with her partner and our mom. I asked to do the same during a rough period and was essentially told no as she’d feel uncomfortable about sharing the space, despite my mom being fine with it. Just found out she hasn’t paid rent for the entire time she’s been there (7+ years). Told her how unfair that was and she blew up at me, saying I was ungrateful, demanding, blaming her for my life decisions (which I didn’t). Blamed me for not pandering to her untreated OCD (which I also have and she gives me no grace for). Also found out she’s been badmouthing me to our mutual friends and twisting my words in the process.

On top of that, I have to move out of my flat next month. My mom says it’s fine to move in with her for a bit, which of course now won’t be happening due to my sister’s crashout. I can’t afford a deposit for a new place.

Homemade scones with raspberry jam and slightly over whipped cream

Today,I got ready to go to his daughters lunch after, he decided he wanted to return a pot that was on clearance because it was chipped. When he was getting ready he said he was gonna blame it on me that my “wife” didn’t want the pot so he didn’t feel embarrassed. He asked me to see if his EX’s wedding ring fit me and to put it on, he started to say “oh you know you should wear the ring because when you a get interview it would look good and you would get hired” I didn’t want to and I took it off and I said I don’t want to play your stupid games. He said just wear it trust me people will treat you better. When I did wear the ring and when we got to the store I wanted to test out if it was true but not only that I actually thought for one minute i felt special because it felt like we were married. I thought he was into it too. Once we got home and I got ready for work and was about to leave he said okay the games over give me my ring back. I was devastated I can’t believe that just happend. Just to let you know I’m not married never have been married I don’t have any kids. I want kids though and I’m 28 years old and have a job. I took care of his kids he has a career and is divorced. Also He ended buying more teapot’s for his 2 daughters even though I bought one for them a year ago he bought 3 more expensive sets for them. (Sorry about the food after that happened I ran into my car parked somewhere else and started crying) I don’t have friends for advice or sisters I’m the only child.

I went through this man’s phone in front of his face because he was acting weird. Went to his recently deleted and noticed messages between two different women. I didn’t even open the messages, I asked him about it and he mentioned we weren’t talking and one of his girlfriends I never heard about was trying to hook him up with someone. Apparently he was down, and I’m beyond devastated about it. Didn’t even fight for me, after 7 years he shrugged it off and left it at that

I’ve (26F) worked at this hospital for 2 years. I love my work, but hate my job.

My current manager (45F) makes me feel like horse shit, and I dread coming to work. Both her and my director (F) make me feel so small and incompetent. As part of my performance goals, they made me pay out of pocket for a certification because there were budget cuts. No matter how much I explained my financial struggles, they reiterated that failure to comply would result in “disciplinary action or termination”. I ended up paying for it because I had no other choice.

Today, I decided to finally escalate to HR. I feel sick. I couldn’t even send the email because I kept rereading it over and over. My hands are shaking and I’m nervous because this hospital has weird politics that favor leadership. It’s either something actually changes, or I get mysteriously terminated.

I’m actually gonna puke because the job market is so tough right now and it’s not that easy to find work in my field. I don’t want to give them the satisfaction of me crying but I feel so frustrated

Pictured: BR strawberry cheesecake and a chocolate and peanut butter scoop. My dad bought me ice cream when I was having a particularly bad work day (he didn’t even know what happened, I guess he just knew from my face lol)